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I feel so sad these days. I took part in my best friend 's wedding, and it would be a happy thing for me, but not at all. I'm insulted by her words,although I knew that she is very busy and anxiety with her wedding.I cannot stand anymore by her words which hurt me and my self-esteem. She said sorry for me many times, but I don't want to forgive her. Reasons for two:She always find fault with me in front of her husband, maybe it's a joke, but beyond my patience, it's more than a shame; She said the word I don't like to hear most: You disappoint me. What a shame word for me. And it's also said in the front of many friends. I try to forgive her, but my conscience tell me, my heart broke badly and is still painful. We have knew each other nearly nine years, I don't want to end, but I feel so SAD.|
Another thing. I just say goodbye for my boyfriend, maybe he is not my boyfriend ever. He cheated me when he met with me, because he has already had girlfriend,but said not for me. When I love him, I lose contact with him. I just want to play with him at the beginning, but I found that I start to like him for I never love anyone before, and he is my first one. I don't know what is love and to be loved. He gave me many wonderful memories. We all like listening music and singing, playing sports and hiking. We are watching movies,playing soccer ball,running,eating lunch, hiking, going shopping, walking in every street of my town and campus,kissing under the sunshine...He is polite and gentle,care me as a baby.When I know he has girlfriend, it's too late to leave him, because I love him deeply.So I become a third one between he and his girlfriend. These days, he told me that he wanted to get married with his girlfriend this year, marriage can make him mature and responsible. I say goodbye to him first, and send a good wishes for his marriage. We promise not to meet each other anymore. And he also said goodbye and wishes me to find a good boy in future.I feel SAD, listen the song we heard together repeatly, but he cannot by my side anymore. I don't know how long I will forget him and it would be a long time for curing my ached heart.
I don't know how to live now. But I know I must take care of myself and help my parents to relief their working stress.
Maybe it's not good now, I will be better and be happy.