Author: snowipine

Do Married men have the right for extramarital love ?   [Copy link] 中文

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Snowipine

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Post time 2013-10-12 22:52:37 |Display all floors
RealMadrid1 Post time: 2013-10-12 15:37
So you appear to have a bias against men, based on your questioning ONLY if men have the right to  ...

hehe,dear Realmarid1,
You are good at the title setting,I am quite appreciate for your first-question,then--give proposed referring new title setting.

Bias?oh,maybe you are right。

But I here give you a referencing case, want know what your opinion is or are:

If you want off line for the time being and want leave a message on your message board,what will you say:

“ bye,see you late”---bias!belittle visitors,who are you saying to?
“bye,friends”---------bias!friends-would-be will say。
“bye,guys”------------bias!only say to men,then lady?
。。。

In this post or article,the “ men”is clearly refer to certain group of people。
We are not lawmaker, so we need‘t give so scientific definition about this。

And at the same time, you too,dodged the core question,“do men have the 。。。。”

Have different opinion,I am very glad to hear yours。

Warm regards。


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Snowipine

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Glod Medal Blogger of 2013

Post time 2013-10-13 06:04:03 |Display all floors
RealMadrid1 Post time: 2013-10-12 01:58
Have you looked at the number for women have extra-marital affairs?

They are approximately equal to ...

Extramarital affairs is not a good social phenomena in any country and region,even with the culture background or religion faith differ from each other greatly。In this dramatic social transformation,marriage and family have gotten great impact by the socioeconomic and cultural change。

Comparably speaking in terms of numbers ,Men has the leading role in their social and economical activities,which are much actively and have much time attend public activity,don’t like women who bearing the much family burdens in bringing up kids,caring older parents and do boring trivial housework。 And women are usually clinging to loyal to family,expecting a harmonious,steady and peaceful marriage and family life。

So the rate of extramarital affairs are quite less in women than men

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Snowipine

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Post time 2013-10-13 06:24:12 |Display all floors
RealMadrid1 Post time: 2013-10-12 15:37
So you appear to have a bias against men, based on your questioning ONLY if men have the right to  ...

Here is saying,“women were made with water and,men were made with mud”
I think you knew this proverb。
If you know this,and you agree with the metaphor of the proverb,then your argument has bias in interpret your observation in this regard。

We,people,give much high respecting for women,and give much high hope,responsibility on men,especial in keep family hormone and safety。

Men has it’s special advantages in some degree in terms of social public activities,where has much more seductive  for men to make mistake intentionally or emotionally。  

If above argument is right then we can say men are easy exceeding the bongs than women。

Based on this logic,we say we should ask and put the focus on “Do Married men have the right for extramarital love ?”

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Post time 2013-10-13 07:25:49 |Display all floors
snowipine Post time: 2013-10-13 06:24
Here is saying,“women were made with water and,men were made with mud”
I think you knew this p ...

A fundamental aspect of marriage is intimacy.  
What I know about Chinese culture is that after the children are born, most women will focus mostly on the child. I'm not just talking about the first year after birth where this is understandable, but the long-term.
At that point the husband just becomes a source of income for support the family. In other words, the lack of sex life, romance and intimacy, leads to a disconnection of both partners, as the child becomes the focus and the bond between them. Once this bond is broken, basic relationship needs are not being met.
The loyalty that the couple originally had before marriage dies, as these loyalties are directed towards the child. So what you have is one of the partners go out and look for the intimacy from somewhere else (in many cases the men) For the sake of the children, or other financial reason most men are reluctant to breakup. Married couples should more take care about their intimacy, the love and passion they had when deciding to marry should be followed through until the end.

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Post time 2013-10-13 12:46:34 |Display all floors
snowipine Post time: 2013-10-12 22:52
hehe,dear Realmarid1,
You are good at the title setting,I am quite appreciate for your first-qu ...

In a word, "NO"

Marriage is the meeting of equals in a relationship where there are socially acceptable norms that frame the relationship's status, be they religious, legal or ethical considerations.

Men that take advantage of their wife's status as a financially dependent person by engaging in an affair, knowing that their spouse will not leave (such as seen in China with mistresses & "second-wives"), are despicable individuals. They use their financial power to control and manipulate.

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Post time 2013-10-13 13:06:59 |Display all floors
snowipine Post time: 2013-10-13 06:24
Here is saying,“women were made with water and,men were made with mud”
I think you knew this p ...

I have never heard such a proverb, and I cannot understand your explanation of it.

I ask a fundamental question - are you male or female?

Based on your posts in this thread, you appear to be claiming that men are the instigators of an affair, seeking some freshness and excitement in their relationship.
Women do likewise, and you would be naive to think that this is not the case.

As "thruthbetold1" has highlighted, that a marriage (in most cases in Western society) has intimacy as a fundamental pillar of it's structure, and when that intimacy is removed by one partner or the other, then it is a logical occurrence that one may seek that component from outside of the marriage, be they male or female.

The concept of marriage as being a way of obtaining "mutual benefits" for the greater families of the married couple such as I understand was (and still is) often the case in China, then the concept of intimacy, love and caring for each other is removed - being replaced by greed for success, in whatever field is sought.
The result of this type of marriage is usually not pretty, with infidelity being the norm, such as mistresses, "second" or even "third" wives being bought into the marriage.

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Snowipine

Rank: 5Rank: 5

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Post time 2013-10-13 14:30:46 |Display all floors
truthbetold1 Post time: 2013-10-13 07:25
A fundamental aspect of marriage is intimacy.  
What I know about Chinese culture is that after th ...

Your opinions have give much deep analysis and presentation about relationship between couples in the family。

But here I want add my other thoughts for reference.

Here is a saying goes” all the happy families have the
Similar experiences”. Man is the backbone of the family, family’s safety much more relying on man, if a the babe/kids and the wife can’t get the basic safety guarantee, then the husband is not a good husband, a responsible husband.

When the matrimony or the family life are happy, and the family economic situation is much better for the family to sustain normal folks’ life , and can futher pursue their common higher grade development aspirations, but if the husband doesn’t cherish the hard-winning happy and harmony family life,  doesn’t or can’t find out the way out to seek futher progress for the family,  intentionally or unintentional uses personal adventage to do the immoral things, betraying the family, then this behavior is not welcomed by the society morality.

Increase the sense of liability and law consciousness of the wrongdoers, is a long and arduous social public cause, reduce the bad influence of the extramarital affairs will greatly increase the happiness of the family and soical stability.

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