Views: 7311|Replies: 15

[Original]Am I an ¨Ogre¨ for my Chinese nephew? [Copy link] 中文

Rank: 8Rank: 8

Post time 2013-6-26 16:05:46 |Display all floors
This post was edited by messi30 at 2013-6-30 16:12

My brother in law lives in the same condominium where I live. It´s a pleasure to have some of my wife´s relatives close to us. He has a cute 2 years old boy who got the attention from the whole family, especially from the grandparents who are helping in the boy´s care..

When they bring the boy to my home, I used to play with him but at the same time when i see the boy sometimes is out of control, grabbing house´s things or messing around, I try to correct him. I love the cleaness at home and I keep it nice and neat, even I understand children´s behavior I try to encourage him to behave better guiding to make him better. For example; when he eats something i put a paper towel on his chest to avoid he mess his shirt, stopping he plays with the mobile phone or with the tv control remote, seating him on the chair when he is eating something around,  Some of this things the grandmother let him to  do it.

To counteract the hard or sour time the boy could feels about me, I make for him pop corn (he loves it) , invite him some cartoons to watch or I play with him, he also loves it.

Yesterday my wife told me ¨my mother said, when the boy doesn´t want to eat, she threatened him saying she will call uncle Leo (me) and the boy start to eat well or when he is too naughty at home, again, she threatened him saying, i will call uncle Leo, and the boy stops¨, we laugh but my wife said ¨sometimes try not to be too strict with the boy¨, I said ¨but i am not strict with him,  I just try to guide him¨ and of course, I stopped with my remarks or teaching suggestions to his parents (that it was  few times).

We didn´t argue about the boy but we found some differences in the children´s guiding. While the grandpa said he will teach the boy when he turns the 3 years old,  I think there is not age for teaching manners, the learning is a gradual process that goes for many years.

I think i did it right and all it was in a kind way, at least the boy never feels afraid of me but maybe he feels a kind of respect because I made some small remarks in him, things sometimes his grandpas and parents didn´t.

This morning the grandpas took the boy to their hometown, I don´t know for how long and I start to miss this boy, especially all the times we met saying ¨hello uncle Leo¨ with a sweet voice {:soso_e109:}.

Do you remember an ¨Ogre¨ among your family when you were a child?



Denial, according the psychoanalysts, is one of the most primary mechanisms of defense. It consists in the attitude of denying or minimizing obvious facts of reality with which the individual can´t  cope or whose irresponsibility is unable to meet.

And I agree.

Use magic tools Report

Rank: 6Rank: 6

Post time 2013-6-26 16:56:51 |Display all floors
You are such an Ogre
Kidding. I think you did the right thing. People tend to spoil children in today's China. Because of the only-child policy.

You have to teach manners as early as possible before it's too late

Use magic tools Report

Rank: 8Rank: 8

2016 Most Popular Member CD top contributor in April 2015 Most Popular Member Medal of honor Medal of honor

Post time 2013-6-26 21:03:20 |Display all floors
manners should be taught from day one.

I worry about the future of kids in China, there is a whole generation of spoiled brats growing up at the moment, not a good thing.

Use magic tools Report

Rank: 6Rank: 6

Post time 2013-6-27 09:28:50 |Display all floors
Sounds like another typical "Little Emperor" in the making.  It's sad to see this everyday in China.  What's going to happen in the future?  

Use magic tools Report

Rank: 8Rank: 8

August's Best Contributor 2012 July's Best Contributor 2012

Post time 2013-6-27 13:20:58 |Display all floors
To give a child love is good,
but don't give whatever he or she wants.
Life is what you make of it

Use magic tools Report

Rank: 8Rank: 8

August's Best Contributor 2012 July's Best Contributor 2012

Post time 2013-6-27 13:25:07 |Display all floors
In my mind, if a couple raise a child, it's better to have one(dad or mom) who should be tough enough to keep the child under untrol and teach manners, right from wrong.

Life is what you make of it

Use magic tools Report

Rank: 8Rank: 8

Post time 2013-6-30 16:13:35 |Display all floors
PPsally Post time: 2013-6-26 16:56
You are such an Ogre
Kidding. I think you did the right thing. People tend to spoil children in  ...

Definetely you are right, but not in the Ogre ¨thing¨
Denial, according the psychoanalysts, is one of the most primary mechanisms of defense. It consists in the attitude of denying or minimizing obvious facts of reality with which the individual can´t  cope or whose irresponsibility is unable to meet.

And I agree.

Use magic tools Report

You can't reply post until you log in Log in | register

BACK TO THE TOP
Contact us:Tel: (86)010-84883548, Email: blog@chinadaily.com.cn
Blog announcement:| We reserve the right, and you authorize us, to use content, including words, photos and videos, which you provide to our blog
platform, for non-profit purposes on China Daily media, comprising newspaper, website, iPad and other social media accounts.