youknowhat Post time: 2013-4-29 21:32
any women not just chinese women...do you like to work or just sittin around allday long or walk aro ...
I once heard that a foreigner who came to China for the first time. He started dating a Chinese girl, things were going great the first few months and they were thinking about getting married until one day the girl demanded that her partner buy a house and hand over his salary to her every month before they marry.
The foreigner was confused and couldn't understand why she would demand these things after all they were so much in love and it came down to this. The foreigner sat in the park one day thinking over and over in his head about their relationship until an old man came and sat next to the foreigner and ask him about his worries. The old man laughed and was not surprised and said "Son, before you marry a Chinese girl, you need to know more about the culture and thinking way"
Its easy to lay back and say woman are the same around the would, but the reality is that cultural differences are real!
Maybe many people in various countries become a woman-digger and pimp the women out to work and they become the kings........gold-digger or woman-digger...no difference except the woman will use one man and control everything and the man will use many women and control everything.....crazy world we live in.
truthbetold1 Post time: 2013-4-30 07:42
I once heard that a foreigner who came to China for the first time. He started dating a Chinese gi ...
I agree with the old man, anyone considering marrying into a different culture should do his/her homework first.... especially regarding bride price. You probably forget that the history of China still has a big effect on its people. Women of marriageable age now will have parents and grandparents who grew up in poverty. They probably cannot understand how the world is changing but no way do they want their offspring to suffer the same fate. Tradition also dictates that the offspring take care of the parents in old age. Although there is limited access to pension now, kids are the parents pension. Parents see it as their duty to make sure their kids make a "suitable" match. In China children (in their parents eyes) remain children and are always under (usually) mothers control.
There is also a growing imbalance in the male/female ratio due to the one child policy and in some respects selective abortion. There are far more males than females. This means that females can be more selective in finding their match. Love is not regarded in the same way as in the west (or even understood). Often it is thought that "love" will come later in the marriage.
This post was edited by dostoevskydr at 2013-4-30 16:53
Laowai2? Post time: 2013-4-30 16:07
I agree with the old man, anyone considering marrying into a different culture should do his/her h ...
Love is not regarded in the same way as in the west (or even understood). Often it is thought that "love" will come later in the marriage.
Even in western romantic relationships, couples make similar tacit evaluations of what each person brings to the relationship. And unconsciously, they tend to chose partners they believe are worthy of them.
To quote Walster; "The notion that people are “commodities” and social relationships are “transactions” will surely make many readers squirm. Exchange theory postulates that human relationships are based first and foremost on self-interest…. Such characterizations contrast sharply with what many of us would like to think of friendship and love".