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This post was edited by WhiteBear at 2012-10-23 09:55|
House? Apartament? OWN before marriage as a "yes or not" reason?
Is that world crazy, or am I?
I don't even want to own a house for myself.
Having as less "significant value" things (like real estates) as possible - makes me movable, "elestic" in the world, that expects to be more and more flexible.
When I would have to move for a job on large distance - I can do it with my wife and kids, just hiring another apartment in new city. With no problems about selling and buying a house, with no problems of maintance of my own if I decide not to sell it....
What means to own a house, even decent apartment, while being young?
It is the anchor, that keeps me in one place.
World moves into flexability - and to own real estate limites it. Somebody have to take care about it when I'm out working in other city, or country, or continent!
And it is very costly too...
In chinese traditional culture young couple sometimes is expected to have a house to take care of old Parents. And Parents helps to rise childrens, and take care about the house too.
With some people I like to live under the same roof, but there is not a guarantee, that my Parents in Law will be them, even if I'll really like Them, and have full respect.
If They would be such a persons - no problem to hire two apartments close to each other, or to hire apartment close to the place where They live. But living under the same roof...? It is only for extremal case, when I have no other way to take care of Them.
If Parents are in poverty - my goal and duty is to help Them, this is obvious (and guaranteed by my country law, that I obey).
But I would better hire an apartment for Them, then buy a house and ask them to live with me.
The same goes with the "dowry".If it is symbolic as a culture custom (few red envelopes in traditional way) - it is OK, but if someone asked me to pay my early income to have a "right" to marry Their daughter... sorry. No. No way. If I would like to buy a wife - I'll look the one to buy. But I do not.
Maybe I'll change my mind over time, but I don't think so.