Author: gqjsy6688

how can i believe my husband [Copy link] 中文

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Post time 2011-6-19 15:15:05 |Display all floors
Originally posted by Ghosty at 2011-6-19 15:12
test

how can i test it?

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Post time 2011-6-19 15:18:13 |Display all floors
Reply to post # 25



Each person built their own destiny and in front of the adversity you have to rebuild your own destiny.
he is 44 years old, you must be around that age. so you're still young enough to find the happiness
I am not suggest you a divorce because children may be affected but if one of you has failed and there are not radical changes in your lives, your suffering will be worst over the time

You have 2 options

Option 1.- Your care for others (your own words)

i dont want he lost his job
if i told anyone he will have no face to colleagues.
i even cant tell his parents , my old brother ,my old sister and anyone.
its hard for him to find new job. he is now 44 years old. actual he doesnt know how to do
i want to divorce but i cannt . his parent dont agree to me. in their eyes, his son is nice and i am a good , honest, nice , filial piety lady. they do like me. and i cannt hurt their heart.
i dont hope my daughter , his parents , my mam , and my close people are unhappy for me.

Option 2.- YOUR CARE FOR YOU and only FOR YOURSELF

You choose

If your husband stay in that work and promise you to end that affair, how to know the other person will give up too? Your pains will be alive all times while your husband  go to work
If your husband cowardly said he wants to kill himself  with you, invite him to show his guts and to find another job and save the relationship and the family. That’s the only way to save your marriage.

What is more important for you?
To save face in front of others and keeping a hide miserable life with a husband cheater? or
To have a calm and happy new life?
Remember
Other people have their own problems, their own life, why to care what they will think or feel? Is not their problem, Its your problem.

Think in yourself, you are still young and with a good job,
be brave, be confident, BE IN THE SAFE SIDE


be smart

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Post time 2011-6-19 15:19:52 |Display all floors
Originally posted by gqjsy6688 at 2011-6-19 15:15

how can i test it?



i replied you

a very long reply but it doesnt show yet

i dont know why CD holding my reply

that is why i post "test" to see if it goes through

and it went through but NO my original reply

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Post time 2011-6-19 15:35:13 |Display all floors
Nooo,don't have these thoughts of suicide,don't ever think them again,as hard it is for you now and you wont believe me,but there are better solutions you will get through this and your life is sacred,think of your daughter and Mom you would leave behind,how this would hurt them!!You must be strong!

Let's not think all negative,your husband cheated on you for 4 yrs yes,because it was easy,he see her every day and you didn't knew.That doesn't mean he don't love you,sometime men are like kids,what they shouldn't do become more attractive to them.Now that you know he is afraid and maybe got his "wake up call".Maybe now the excitement of having an affair is gone for him because he realizes what is at stake (losing his job,face,family..)He asked you to forgive him so he choses for his family.Maybe he or his collegue can ask for a transfer so they wont see each other anymore?

You are not alone in this one it happens to so many women and most get through it,because we women are that strong.Now I am not a counselor,is there a possibility for you to find one?Or do you have a close good friend who can keep a secret ,who can support you?It is no good to be alone and have to think of this all the time,you need someone who knows you through and through you can talk to.

If you want revenge don't go having an affair,the shame will be on you it will mean also the end of the family ending in a divorce,but in that case consider contacting Zhang,this is her blog:...lost the link will find it for you..

found it,but can't edit my post?Hmmm
visit Zhang's blog:    blog.sina.com.cn/zhangyufen1957


even if you don't want revenge it will do you good to see what happens to some unfaithful husbands and their mistresses,hehe :)

anyway you said you like reading books,why don't you buy some books on the subject?You might find the right solution fit for you,how to deal with your feelings,your husband etc..
Time will tell you what to do,I hope you find both your way to make things work together,he should appreciate what kind hearted and loyal woman you are,he maybe now realize,talk to him.Maybe is also good to write things down to get it of your chest.

I wish you all the best!

[ Last edited by Kiki1971 at 2011-6-19 04:18 PM ]

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Post time 2011-6-19 15:51:59 |Display all floors
Originally posted by Kiki1971 at 2011-6-19 15:35
Nooo,don't have these thoughts of suicide,don't ever think them again,as hard it is for you now and you wont believe me,but there are better solutions you will get through this and your life is sac ...


http://blog.sina.com.cn/zhangyufen1957

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Post time 2011-6-19 16:00:58 |Display all floors
Originally posted by Ghosty at 2011-6-19 15:18
Reply to post # 25



Each person built their own destiny and in front of the adversity you have to rebuild your own destiny.
he is 44 years old, you must be around that age. so you're still y ...

thank you so much. you are so nice for me. thanks. i hope i will be smart.
i agree with you .i want to  have a calm and happy new life. sure. i want to change it. its hard for us to find another job. he have to stay in that work !! i dont know how to do. i dont know if she will give up or not.
the most important thing is my  mentality. get rid of all of the unhappy. Maybe I should turn blind eye and close eye? its the only thing . i feel unhappy is my problem.  Only I can save myself.




i .

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Post time 2011-6-19 16:21:30 |Display all floors
Originally posted by Kiki1971 at 2011-6-19 15:35
Nooo,don't have these thoughts of suicide,don't ever think them again,as hard it is for you now and you wont believe me,but there are better solutions you will get through this and your life is sac ...

thank you so much. thank you for understanding me. yeah, he told me he he love me . he want a happy life. he said he only play a game with her. He soughts to stimulate.
i have thoughts of suicide. because i dont know how to do . i feel my life is pain and suffering. but i cant kill myself. so thats so painful. yeah, i wouldnt hurt them.
i have a close good friend who can keep a secret . i havent told her. i dont want my friend know everything . maybe for my husband"s face.  i will try to
i

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