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My dairy Land [Copy link] 中文

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Post time 2010-7-9 08:56:57 |Display all floors
Here I started my dairy land to practise my writing and if anything mistake, pls help to point out,thanks.

Colleague relationship
  
  
   There was a unhappy thing happened below I and another colleagues this afternoon. We just did our random talk but do not know how the subject switched Ruby, who used my computer last night. As I wronly said with joked mood that she had used it for more than 3 hours which, after checked, is not correct. But what is out of our imagination is that she got very angry about this as seems she treated it as a humiliation to her. This just recalled my memory of last time we had some kind of semblable experience with her. I just can not accept was how can she got so angry about such joke while last night, when I was back from outside, asked her to leave since I wanted to use the computer but failed after more than 4 times even I claimed I would take off my clothes just in order to force her off. And then I had no way but went out the corridor to kill the waiting time. It really a very a bad feeling to experience such things twice. After about 15 minutes at last she left with some kind of loath words. And this afternoon, she sent a letter to me claiming that she had been humiliated because she thought that she just spent 30 minutes using my computer and this made my decision to not talk to her any more. Seems my action is not a matuer one but I can not control myself not to do that.
   Recalling my quarel with her another time, I think she is a assertive guy who even believed "没有调查就没有发言权!“ was created by 彭德怀 with so much confidence that at that moment I even believed that before I went back to our dorm to check the internet.

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Post time 2010-7-9 18:38:34 |Display all floors
Seems little guys pay attention to such thing as too long to read, understandable.

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Post time 2010-7-10 12:41:58 |Display all floors
Below is what I would have changed

   There was an unhappy event that happened between  myself and another colleagues this afternoon. We were talking about random things, but then the subject switched to Ruby, who used my computer last night. I said  in a joking manner  that she had used it for more than 3 hours which, after checked, is not correct. For some reason sh got very angry about this as seems she treated it as a humiliation to her. This just recalled my memory of last time we had a similar experience with her. I just can not accept  how she can get so angry about such a joke. Last night, when I was back from outside, I asked her to leave since I wanted to use the computer but failed after more than 4 times even I claimed I would take off my clothes just in order to force her off. And then I had no way but went out the corridor to kill g time while waiting. It really a very a bad feeling to experience such things twice. After about 15 minutes at last she left with some kind of loath words. And this afternoon, she sent a letter to me claiming that she had been humiliated because she thought that she just spent 30 minutes using my computer and this caused me not talk to her any more. Seems my action is not a mature one but I can not control myself not to do that.

   Recalling my quarel with her another time, I think she is a assertive guy (should be girl) who even believed "没有调查就没有发言权!“ was created by 彭德怀 with so much confidence that at that moment I even believed that before I went back to our dorm to check the internet.

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Post time 2010-7-10 22:39:00 |Display all floors
Hi Felix

   Thanks for your correction and after chcked your suggestiong is really very nice but to be honest, compared the sentence word by word is a hard work.

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Post time 2010-7-11 05:11:33 |Display all floors
Originally posted by Mahone02 at 2010-7-10 22:39
Hi Felix

   Thanks for your correction and after chcked your suggestiong is really very nice but to be honest, compared the sentence word by word is a hard work.



Next time I will but the changes in bold while keeping the original there for comparison.

What you wrote was in general understandable.

Your english is pretty good, how long have you been learning it?

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Post time 2010-7-11 09:44:22 |Display all floors
Originally posted by felix292 at 2010-7-11 05:11



Next time I will but the changes in bold while keeping the original there for comparison.

What you wrote was in general understandable.

Your english is pretty good, how long have you be ...



Thanks for your praise and appreciate your help to improve.

About my English study, same as most of the Chinese who were born on 1980s, it was from Junior middle school. But to be honest, I was not a English Major when I was at college.

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Post time 2010-7-11 11:54:07 |Display all floors
Anytime you would like some help with English I would be happy to do so.

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