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Relationship-Money trouble(e-c)practice [Copy link] 中文

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Post time 2008-3-19 10:54:25 |Display all floors
Money trouble
钱带来的麻烦
money.JPG


Money's one of the main causes of conflict in relationships. Living on the breadline is bound to cause tension - but, says relationship psychotherapist Paula Hall often the biggest problems aren't down to a lack of cash, but how to spend what you have.

  钱是引起关系矛盾的主要原因之一。”吃白食“注定会引起紧张--但是关系精神治疗医师Paula Hall说往往第一大的问题并不是缺少钱,而是如何花拥有的钱。


Attitudes towards money
对钱的态度


People's attitudes towards money vary enormously and are largely influenced by the values they were brought up with and, to a certain extent, how much money they have now.

Assuming there's enough money to keep a roof over your head and buy basic food stuffs, what you do with the rest of your money will depend on your particular attitude. The following three statements broadly sum up the most common attitudes to money in today's western culture:

  人们对钱的态度差别很大而且很大程度上受到了成长中价值观念的影响;而且在某个程度上受到现在拥有多少钱的影响。

  假设有足够的钱来让你不愁吃穿,那么对于剩下的钱你会如何开销这时就将取决于个人态度。

  以下三条陈述粗略地总结了在西方文化中人们对待钱的最常见的几种态度。

1. Money is for enjoying - money is for spending on the things that make you happy. No one knows what the future may hold, so you should enjoy what you have when you have it. Money's no use when you're dead, so live for today.

1. 钱是为了享受--钱是花在让你快乐的事物上。 谁也说不准未来如何,因此你应该及时享乐。 生后钱是一文不值,所以今朝有酒今朝醉吧。

2. Money is for security - money should be spent on making life comfortable. Once you have the basic home comforts, it's important to have money put aside for a rainy day. No one knows what the future may hold, so it's sensible to be prepared.

2.钱是为了安全--钱应该花在让生活舒适的地方。 一旦你拥有了基本的家庭舒适品,就要把钱存起来未雨绸缪。 谁也不会知道未来怎样,所以有所准备是理智的做法。

3. Money is for sharing - money should be shared generously with those you love and those less fortunate than yourself. Buying presents, entertaining others and giving money to charity creates feelings in yourself and others that are priceless. No one knows what the future may hold, and some day you may need the favour returned.

3.钱是为了分享--钱应该和你所爱及没有你那么幸运的人一起分享的东西。 买礼物、娱乐别人、把钱捐给慈善机构都能让你和他人带来无价的感受。 谁也不知道未来怎样,有朝一日你也许会需要报答。


Negotiating the money minefield
闯入“钱”的雷区


If you and your partner have the same attitude towards money, the only thing you need to agree on is who's going to manage the income and expenditure. (To see if you share the same attitude, see Your financial agreement.)

If your attitudes are quite different, you'll need to agree on some basic budget priorities, such as how much money you'll spend on household essentials and bills, how much on leisure and entertainment, and how much you'll save. For help with this, see Creating a monthly budget.

However, if you find that no matter how hard you try to sort out your money differences you still end up arguing, perhaps money isn't the issue at all.

  如果你和伴侣对钱的态度相同,那么你们唯一需要达成一致的就是由谁来管理收入和开销(要了解是否你们的态度一直,请参见”理财协议“一文)

  如果你们的态度十分不同,你们就需要对例如:在家庭必需品和账单上将话多少、在休闲和娱乐上花多少、以及存多少,这类基本预算优先事物上达成一致。要获得这方面的帮助请参阅“如何制作每月预算”一文)

  不过,如果你发现不论你们花了多大力气来消除钱上的分歧,最终都是以争吵结尾,也许就完全不是钱的问题了。


Money can't buy you love
钱不能为你买爱情


If you're financially challenged, try some of these low-budget romantic tips:

  如果经济有困难,尝试以下低开支的爱情提示:

    * Buy a cheap bottle of bubble bath and share a sud-tub. 买一瓶廉价的洗浴泡沫液;一起泡浴缸。
    * Spend an evening dancing to your favourite songs.一个晚上听着最喜爱的歌曲跳舞
    * Drag the duvet on to the sofa, close the curtains and snuggle up in front of your favourite movie.
      把软棉被拉上沙发、拉上窗帘搂在一起看你们最喜爱的电影
    * Cook a meal for two and share it bistro-style, complete with candles, freshly picked flowers and a bottle of cheap vino!
      做一次两人饭菜,采取小餐馆风格,放上蜡烛和新鲜采摘的鲜花以及一瓶瓶便宜的红酒!


Money and value
钱和个人价值


Arguments about money often mask more deep-rooted problems, such as an individual's sense of value or power within the relationship.

对钱的争执往往掩盖了位于更深处的问题,例如:个人对价值观或两人关系中的权力地位

We all need to feel valued as human beings, but there are times when the way in which our partner spends money can make us feel worthless.

我们都需要感到自己拥有人的尊重,但是有时候我们伴侣花钱的方式让我们感到自己没有价值

    * always spend more money on themselves or friends than on you往往在自己或朋友身上花比在你身上花更多的钱
    * complain regularly about how much money you spend on yourself经常抱怨你对自己花了多少钱
    * fail to check if you're all right for money before spending their spare cash在对方花零花钱时没有检查是否你在钱上没有问题。
    * question you on every penny you spend问你花的每一分钱


Money and influence
钱和影响力


The most successful relationships tend to be those in which the partners feel they have equal influence. Arguing about money may indicate that one of you feels the other has an unfair advantage. You may feel this way if, for example, your partner:

  最为成功的关系往往是找到了那些双方拥有平等影响力的关系。 关于钱的争执也许表明你们中有一方感到对方占了不公平的优势。 出现下面情况时,你也许就会感到这种感觉

    * contributes significantly more than you to the financial running of the household 对方对家庭经济运营的贡献远大于你
    * expects you to account for every penny you've spent but is secretive about their own spending
       对方希望你解释花的每一分钱;而自己却对花销保密
    * uses their extra earnings on things you can't share in any way
       对方在多花钱的地方你一点也不能分享
    * constantly buys you extravagant gifts and treats, which leave you feeling indebted
       对方不断给你买奢侈礼物,让你感觉“亏欠”对方。


Seeking help
寻求帮助


If any of this rings a bell for you, find some time when you and your partner can sit down and talk about it.

If you find you're just slipping back into the same old pattern of arguments, you might want to consider talking it through with a third person. To find out more, see Do you need counselling?

如果任何一点让你产生似成相识的感觉,请找时间和对方坐下来谈论。

如果你们还是重退回那老套的争执中也许你要考虑希望和第三方探讨。

如果了解更多信息,请见“你需要咨询吗“一文.


[ Last edited by hly_2009 at 2008-3-21 12:12 PM ]

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Post time 2008-3-21 10:05:49 |Display all floors

以下三条陈述出略地总结了在西方文化中人们对待钱的最常见的几种态度。

You must change a  wrong word in chinese,.
以下三条陈述出略地总结了在西方文化中人们对待钱的最常见的几种态度。
以下三条陈述粗略地总结了在西方文化中人们对待钱的最常见的几种态度。

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Post time 2008-3-21 10:33:58 |Display all floors
中文表达有点奇怪:
Once you have the basic home comforts。。。。: 一旦你拥有了基础家庭舒适。。。
不知道怎么改会好一点。。。。
Just do it

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Post time 2008-3-21 12:12:30 |Display all floors
Thank you for your replies :-)

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Post time 2008-3-22 19:23:39 |Display all floors

thx

thx for your translation~

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Post time 2008-3-22 22:58:52 |Display all floors

hi

thank you! it's helpful

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Post time 2008-4-9 13:36:35 |Display all floors
Originally posted by mikkle at 2008-3-21 10:33
中文表达有点奇怪:
Once you have the basic home comforts。。。。: 一旦你拥有了基础家庭舒适。。。
不知道怎么改会好一点。。。。


可不可以说“一旦你拥有了舒适的家庭”

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