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澄清的茶水染绿染浓 C-E [Copy link] 中文

Rank: 6Rank: 6

Post time 2007-4-5 14:47:15 |Display all floors
沙发前面的茶几上,摆着两杯热茶。望着杯子里尖细的茶叶载沉载浮和澄清的茶水染绿染浓,我怎么也没有想到杯水之间,能呈现如此的清幽和美丽。

------摘自章诒和《往事并不如烟》


============Challenge C-E. Practice makes perfect.=================

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Rank: 6Rank: 6

Post time 2007-4-5 14:59:16 |Display all floors

ON the tea table in front of the couch, two glasses of tea were just served.

With the tea leaves sinking and emerging inside, the clear hot water gradually turn green and dense, revealing an tiny world of surprizingly purity and loveliness.

文字真jiaoqing~

[ Last edited by workout at 2007-4-5 03:02 PM ]

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Rank: 6Rank: 6

Post time 2007-4-6 15:17:26 |Display all floors

workout 真是翻译散文的好手,再次借用,再次学习一下。

沙发前面的茶几上,摆着两杯热茶。望着杯子里尖细的茶叶载沉载浮和澄清的茶水染绿染浓,我怎么也没有想到杯水之间,能呈现如此的清幽和美丽。

There are two glasses of hot tea on the tea-table in front of the sofa.  The tea leaves are sinking and emerging inside, and the clear tea-water is gradually turning green and dense. It is  beyond my imagination that the tiny world of a glass of tea is so pure and lovely.

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Post time 2007-4-6 15:30:46 |Display all floors

my try:-)

There are two cups of hot tea on a tea table before the sofa. Looking at the leaves floating in green tea water inside, I find peace and beauty that I never would expect to find in a tea cup.

[ Last edited by hly2008 at 2007-4-6 03:33 PM ]

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Post time 2007-4-6 15:56:05 |Display all floors

sink和emerge?

这两个词似乎大了一点,而且给人一种很有分量的感觉,把茶叶写的太重了。关于“载沉”想到了一个词subside,但是“载浮”还没有想到什么好词,用rise略嫌普通。
模仿workout的句型写一下第1句:On the end table in front of the couch laid two glasses of hot tea.
欢迎大家斧正。

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Post time 2007-4-7 14:00:56 |Display all floors
载沉载浮 sinking and emerging 我觉得用在科技文章里面好一些呢,不知道各位如何认为,另外,我发现一种用法,或许可以借鉴:
1)An endless sea of grey figures floating up and down the street  (googling result)
     灰色的人流犹若无边的海洋,在街道上载沉载浮。
2) It's a song that has me "floating up and down", but leads to a strong feeling of
    eventually rising high up into the sky. (googling result)
    我在歌声中载沉载浮,但强烈的感觉最终来临,好像飞升到了高高的天空。

我记得以前Coolmax说过的一句话给我印象很深,就是“摒弃那种一个萝卜一个坑”的翻译思想。 深以为然。 愚见,请指正。

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Rank: 6Rank: 6

Post time 2007-4-7 17:37:51 |Display all floors
沙发前面的茶几上,摆着两杯热茶。望着杯子里尖细的茶叶载沉载浮和澄清的茶水染绿染浓,我怎么也没有想到杯水之间,能呈现如此的清幽和美丽。

On the tea table in front of the sofa, two cups of tea were warm and ready. Gazing at the pattern of the tapered leaves, then floating, and the clear tea, green and thick, I was charmed by  a spell of peace and tranquility which I had never before expected to find in a cup of tea.
If winter comes, can spring be frozen ahead?

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