Author: bevshine

I was married today, no ring and no flower [Copy link] 中文

Rank: 4

Post time 2006-12-13 05:11:43 |Display all floors
my wife and I share the household responsibilities.  There are certain things she does more frequently because either she likes to do them or she's better at them, such as laundry, cooking, shopping for food, etc.  I like to cook, but I'm not very good at cooking Chinese food.  We do eat a good mix of Chinese and American food.  I cook spaghetti once a week and pork chops with baked potatoes another night.  She cooks on other nights.  sometimes we don't eat together depending on our schedules.  but everything works out ok.  I usually do the dishes because I'm good at it and I like to do it.  I always cut the onions for her because she is very short and close to the onion - her eyes are very sensitive to the onion juice, whereas I am very tall and not so sensitive.  I like to help her with the cooking.  She's a fantastic cook - never uses a recipe book.  

It sounds to me like you and your husband do not have a very close relationship, perhaps you don't know how to be together.  He has his games he likes to play on the computer, his tv shows he watches, his friends he hangs out with and his work.  You have your work and the priorities in your life, like your family.  But what do you share together?

If you share one thing, tell us what it is.  Maybe we can help you make that shared thing more important in your life.  Perhaps you both like travel?  If so, you can plan simple traveling or exploration of new places every month.  Perhaps you like food?  Get some recipe books from foreign cultures and try new dishes together.  Perhaps you like music?  Start going to see a live concert every week.  Something simple and fun.  Local universities and colleges have students performing for free in every city in China.  Check the local bulletin boards to find out where they are.

Whatever thing you both like to do together, strengthen that.  The other things you are struggling with will become less important as you learn to enjoy your lives together as a couple.

Remember, the most important thing is to try to find things you share in common.  That you both like equally well.  And then focus on doing more of those things.

Good luck!
Living in New York, Traveling in China.  Let's do business!
whiteboy4us@hotmail.com

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Rank: 4

Post time 2006-12-13 15:37:12 |Display all floors

unbelieve !

we even didn't have kiss in last four years!!!!!

he is man?  unbelieve

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Rank: 6Rank: 6

Post time 2006-12-13 15:55:56 |Display all floors
Originally posted by bevshine at 2006-12-8 20:32


i don't mind he is poor, but i do care that he is lazy. His lazy make me feel depressed.
The family background is very important in the marriage because their living habit is different.
I thi ...


I don't think you knew nothing about his laziness till the very day You married

unless it was a forced marriage. Why do you marry him now that you dislike

him so much?No one can understand why you do it after reading your thread.

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Rank: 1

Post time 2006-12-13 21:26:31 |Display all floors
i think your husband don't know what romantic means to girls.but he must have some excellence you like.

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Rank: 8Rank: 8

Post time 2006-12-14 01:10:19 |Display all floors
Originally posted by bevshine at 2006-12-8 20:12
I was married today with no ring and flowers.
My husband and i met 5 years ago and we just get married today in the law.
we don't know what time will have the wedding becasue we don't have own h ...


Base on your description....you love him and he loves you...but clearly you guys are incompatible in every way...true love alone can not hold a marriage together forever...besides how long can true love last?...all I can say is that you are not in a good position right now...having a child will only add to the stress and frustration that you are experiencing now...do you really want to have a child with him?

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Rank: 1

Post time 2006-12-17 23:10:26 |Display all floors
If you aren't getting along, don't have children! Do not do it!! .Your life will be very depressing.
Find someone you like and get out of the marriage. You are still young!
And if there hasn't been a kiss in the past 4 years, there is a BIG problem....sexual interest in one another holds married relationships together...

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Rank: 4

Post time 2006-12-28 21:47:52 |Display all floors
u wont know that he is lazy ? in  5 year what u know about him? it is ur mistak u cant understand him . btw wish u good luck .

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