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hi, spaceman, sorry to hear things about your brother. |
I am a Chinese, so i would like to speak out my opinion. I agree there is slight difference between the two cultures but the most important thing is the unerdtanding between two persons.
"I have been dating my Chinese gf for a while (2nd time dating, she broke up with me earlier for my mistakes). We are not at the making love stage yet.... "
It was only the second time dating , that means you don't know each other well. That's also the main reason that your gf refused to stay with you overnight. Most of the Chinese girls are very cautious about being "alone" with male" . If she doesn't trust you to that extent, she will refuse to accompany you,especailly when you hope her to spend the weekend wtih you in ur room (even without sex, maybe only your excuse for sex in her eyes). In China, mothers don't allow their daughters to stay in bf's house overnight before marriage. So please respect this tradition.
" where I am from people who love each other support each other when tragedy falls upon them."
The same in China but in different way.
" I will search in the internet about chinese medicine against blood cancer (sometimes chinese medicine is more useful and effective than west medicine), and let you know and try to find it with you together and mail it to your brother;"
This is the way she tried to help you.
I can understand how sad and weak in your heart in this situation, and you need support and help , try to tell her what you hope but still respect her dicision. Love her as before and give her freedom to make dicision. It's hard for two to understand each other and keep balance even if you are married in the first several years. Misunderstanding happens everyday, so more communication will help a lot.
You can ask her to come for a few hours to accompany you, i think she will not refuse you. BUt anyhow respect her dicision.
"But I wouldn't follow your words and do what you want -- spend night at your place; for what? what I should do there? what you are asking is like what I saw in the movie, but I am not actor/ player... "
Your gf is serious in your relationship. She thought since she is not ur wife, why stay in ur house ? Some male are playboys, they like to play love games with female. They don't take love so seriously. After sex, they will disappear. That's also why female are more cautious about that. And she doesn't trust you to that extent.
Hope it helps a bit.