Author: spaceman

Please explain my culture mistake!!! PLEASE!? [Copy link] 中文

Rank: 1

Post time 2006-8-19 03:14:18 |Display all floors
Originally posted by xinwo88 at 2006-8-18 07:23
The guy is just a pervert (nothing to do with culture.)  He's trying to use sympathy to "lure" the girl to spend time with him in a bedroom with the hopes of having sex (he wishes for &qu ...


I kind of agree with this opinion.  It sounds as though your primary concern is having sex with your gf when it should be your brother's health.  You should have asked her if she could stay with you and not bring up the sex thing - that was what ticked her off.....

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Rank: 4

Post time 2006-8-19 07:58:22 |Display all floors
I agree that his primary concern should be his brother's health but everyone deals with problems differently. Some want to be alone. some will want companionship. some will also need to find a way to vent his frustrations. Maybe by going to the gym or by having sex. Physical activity can help releave stress. At 37,  he should be mature enough to handle this kind of thing. But then again, some people never grow up.

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Rank: 4

Post time 2006-8-19 08:29:04 |Display all floors
You man needs to trust your feelings more.  If you feel that your gf doesn't like you, doesn't want to spend time with you, etc.  it probably means that the relationship is already in serious danger.

Anyway, I've read your email, as a woman, I can tell you that it does sound like you are trying to use the situation to elicit something... bad use!   But then, I could be wrong.

Good luck.

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Post time 2006-8-19 09:23:10 |Display all floors
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Rank: 6Rank: 6

Post time 2006-8-19 09:27:54 |Display all floors

to #18

I don't know... I don't mind having my boyfriend need to lean on me every once in a while. It lets my nurturing instincts take over. If my boyfriend said, "I'm having a family crisis; can you come over so I don't feel so alone?" I'd go over. But it is a cultural thing, and I can imagine how in China, such a thing wouldn't be normal.

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Rank: 4

Post time 2006-8-19 09:36:09 |Display all floors
I agree that he doesn't know how to deal with the problem with his brother but he did say that even if she didnt want to have sex, it would be ok. I think we need to get more information about why she left him the first time and what mistakes he made. I will also agree that women want a strong man that they can lean on, not the other way around. They want a mature man who can handle things. A 37 year old man should have enough experience in life to know how to handle life, death, and love. My prediction is that she leaves him again soon for being too weak.

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Rank: 4

Post time 2006-8-19 09:59:54 |Display all floors

ur girl friend's decision is right,but

she is a little over reacted.

see how  she reacted   " i am not mad, you are mad!

you are already 37 years old, so please act as adult, mature man!"

she can just say no, but no need to blame his bf like that.

dont  u think?

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