Author: lululuv

how should women act in China? [Copy link] 中文

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Post time 2006-5-21 14:16:47 |Display all floors
Originally posted by whampoa at 2006-5-21 13:32

It is not “bad confidence” but good TRUST must be earned.  I am sure the secret agent will soon leave me to wander on my own after the initial first two days of walking me round the places.

I don't think you understand North Korea or any totalitarian system. You will not feel at ease. And he/she won't let you off. That is how paranoid North Korea is.

As to whether N. Korea is a terrible country, it is not known and not tested yet.  Has the Americans and the West been more trustworthy and respectful of the  sovereign rights of other countries, I am sure North Korean will be willing and even more willing to open up and cooperate to ensure world peace and harmony.

I am not sure if a coup d'etat counts as a legitimate transfer of power (as it happened in Korea, and which led to civil war, and later UN involvement).

The current incident of Iran is a living example of what “hell” the untrustworthy so called “democratic” Americans and Westerners can cause.  They have already created “hell” in Iraq.  Of course, “hell” is never happening in their country but in others.  So trust them!

No, I don't trust the American government. But I trust Iran one thousand times less, to put everything in perspective.

Hamas was “democratically” elected by the Palestinians.  Why wouldn’t the Americans recognise its legitimacy?

They should. But they don't, and that is hypocrisy. They say: "You need democracy in the Middle East", but when there is democracy, they don't accept the outcome. And that is hypocritical. And very bad, because people in the Middle East will fail to understand what America really wants.

You don't have to tell me how bad America is right now. I will agree with you. Completely.

But it has only a minor relevance to the topic here.

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Post time 2006-5-23 17:18:03 |Display all floors

A few rules of thumb when dealing with the Chinese

the only thing you need to do in China to get along perfectly well are the following:

1 Be more polite to people than you would be in your own country
2 Read a book on Chinese etiquette and talk about it with your Chinese hosts, they will be more than happy to discuss any detail of Chinese etiquette and you will learn immediately from the source
3 Never lose your temper, stay polite and if you feel you are going to lose your temper go to the washingroom or just ignore the feeling untill you have found an appropriate time, place and fellow westerner to complain to.
4 Never make jokes about China or the Chinese no matter how absurd some situations will seem to you. To the Chinese, China is holy and not to be desecrated in any way, not even by subtle joke by foreigners especially, you are a guest and hence treated that way, behave like that as well.
5 If there is a rule and you know it, FOLLOW IT, if there is a rule and you don't know it (of which there are plenty) excuse yourself immediately for any offence you might or might not have given and act as a remorsefull bad student, this behaviour will get you out of almost any situation that you might have gotten yourself into, by accident or on purpose
6 dress to impress, a person wearing a suit or at least clean clothing will be treated nicer than a smelly dirty backpacker.

I follow these rules very carefully and have had nothing but good experiences with the Chinese, especially my restraint is appreciated by all (except my GF, but that is another story) .  Losing your temper in public is the worst thing that could happen to you, coz it will be perceived as "childish".  

I love China and wish to continue living here for a long time to come, hence having good relations (guanxi) is very important, being polite to everyone helps you out a lot, and if they are not polite to you, you won't have to worry too much, loads of friendly and polite Chinese left, but do remember not to take this politeness for friendliness these are two different concepts in the mind of a chinese person.  Friendliness only builds up after prolonged and verified politeness (kind of the other way around in the west) .

Take care, have fun and enjoy the magnificent Zhongguo.

Oh yea and just to break the Ice, learn how to say Ni Hao, Xie xie and bu hao yisi (hello, thank you and sorry)

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