Author: force_one

I feel very disappointed with the people of this forum [Copy link] 中文

Rank: 4

Post time 2006-5-5 23:46:24 |Display all floors
there are so many things beyond words. it is just the different interpretations of things. it takes time and an open mind to understand other cultures.

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Rank: 1

Post time 2006-5-6 09:15:37 |Display all floors

Chinese are not Cold.

To: force_one
       I read the replies one by one, and now I believe that you should not feel disappointed with the people of this forum, right? Up to now, it have almost 3pages replies, that's prove Chinese are not cold, especially the people in this forum.
        Actually, I don't think Chinese People are cold, I think there are two reasons why you thought your former colleagues are cold, first: they don't have good english, they are afraid that they would make mistake when talking with you. Second, mabe you're in a high level, or you're always very cold, so they are scare to talk with you. I don't know the really situations, it just my guess. but in my office, we also have foreigner, I'm willing to talk with him, and he also have many Chinese friends, even outside the  company. I think you said Chinese people are cold, it aslo depends on how you communicate with Chinese People. Do you think so?
        You know, China is a country with vast terrority & abundant resources, most of the people from other provicence are come to Guangdong to seek a better development, to have successful life, same as you. but Guangdong is far away from their hometown, that's why they go home once a year, and also, time & money are the important factors to decide go home or not. not sure whether you can understand on this point.
        In China, almost all of the people would not say "I love you" to their monther/father, "I love you" only express between lovers. As Chinese people are traditional, open-minded not yet rooted in everybody's mind. I never say "I love you" to my mother/father, but I will always buy what they want. they never say "I love you", but they always say "take care", when we end of our call.
        Traditional stands China's culture while Open stands Western's culture, when you living in China, pls try to be in a traditional way & traditional mind. with that, you will feel easy when you communicating with Chinese people
.

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Rank: 6Rank: 6

Post time 2006-5-6 16:41:09 |Display all floors

To: Force_one

Another factor that people did'nt reply the thread you mentioned is that it is an "advertisement".  People normally ingore the advertisement, people generally hold their suspicions on any advertisement.

You see, you've got so many replies under your thread, which is not an ad. ^_^

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Rank: 4

Post time 2006-5-6 22:40:32 |Display all floors

chinese way to love mother

I never say "I love you " to my mother since born . but I have different way to love her .  For example : when I was student :  helped her do housework , cooking ,cleaning ,wash clothes; accumulated  pennies in order to  buy socks when her birthday and write chorale to her , even wrote letter to my older-brother if he behaved bad and made mother sick  (because as a child , I was afraid of my elder-brother , we would fight if I argue with him but that is funny memory :)            
Now I work and earn money by myself . I often post money to her or buy tonic , communicate with her three times a month on phone (but my mom say it is better to call her once a week , sometimes she will call me if she miss or worry me )

I don't know how to describe the love mom give to us ; whether we are young or old , she love us endlessly.  Care your mom ,especially she become old , if not , you will regret at the day she leave this world .  

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Rank: 6Rank: 6

Post time 2006-5-7 21:17:08 |Display all floors
to cherry
i understand from you guys the chinesse are not cold. i would say are different better, in my case as i said in my initial post, it wasn't only my own opinion, i said is also opinions from other foreigners that i met in a party, and also, a chinesse mature woman, said the same, and also many situations happen why i said chinesse are cold,
in the office i was the manager, (now i have my own company) and i treated all the chinesse people not as a boss, i treath them as a friend, i am very friendly person, who likes to talk and who likes to listen, many times we make jokes and everybody enjoyed, we were happy with me, i told them many advices, and we had many meetings in the boardroom, at the end, everybody said to me thank you, because i left in one of them a good advices, i told them in the company we are colleagues, out of the company we are friends, and i could be the best friend of the world if they want it,
one day we organized a short trip two hours far from Yiwu, (where we were working) and we were like 11 chinesse people and 3 foreigners, everything was fine, we saw mountains and some typhical chinesse escenary, temples, and monuments, etc, but all the chinesse friends run away and most of the day they went for their own way , separates, and i get a little angry, but i  didn't say anything
i bouthg breakfast, lunch, by my own the ticket by bus and train was on the company, when we returned home, everybody said just "bye" only one of them said "thank you" and coming this word from the guy who works in the warehouse and doesn't speak english
the next day everybody were happy and asked me when we can go togheter again to trip to shanghai and i respond with a smile, "no, more trips" like a joke with a seroius message
i call them for a meeting and i asked them their opiinions about the trip, they like it and were very happy, so i told them that the three foreingers who were in the trip we wanted somebody to explain maybe the meaning of some monuments, or places that we visited, and i noticed them that they were selfish to ignore us and ran away by their own, and also the importance to say "thank you" if they got something o had a goood moment,  i explain the importance to say "thank you" "i love you" "sorry" in differents ocassions or depend the situations, only one of them said, "well, is about culture too" i understood, but if we are friends and we are togheter, we have understand each other and they have more chances to learn because they interact also with foreigners, so good chance to learn from other cultures
my point is, ok, i won't say chinesse are cold, i will say they are different, but what i don't understand is , if a lot chinesse and not chinesse replies many posts in this forum why not for mother's day, and this is not a competition, if they don't say i love you, and have another way to express, fine, but it is better to say something that ignore that mother's day post
for simba
i don't understand why you said "advertisement" it was only a post, dedicate to a mother, if in my initial post i put add, it was because i didn' wanted to mention post many times, but it wasn't an advertisement
yes, i got many replies but replies defending chinesse are not cold, and also about their way to love their mothers, it could be better to reply directly to Mother's day initial post

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Rank: 6Rank: 6

Post time 2006-5-7 21:52:44 |Display all floors

Reply #26 force_one's post

Dear force_one, I thought it was an advertisement because you mentioned it as an "add".  I am sorry for that.

However, have we sensed something from your comment " i got many replies but replies defending chinesse are not cold"???

This is the main problem on this BBS, whenever someone explains something to another one, it is considered as a "defend". And whenever someone has a different opinion against another one, it will be regarded as an "offence".

We need more crashes...crash each other into pieces and combined those crashes together again into a whole piece...

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