Author: evapapa

chinese men way of thinking [Copy link] 中文

Rank: 4

Post time 2005-12-6 20:04:36 |Display all floors

Look at this

http://unjobs.org/video/1106921009.11


and look at this

http://english.people.com.cn/english/200010/23/eng20001023_53395.html


and this

http://www.china.org.cn/english/MATERIAL/16484.htm


and this

http://www.unifem-eseasia.org/resources/others/domesticviolence/PDF/China.pdf

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Rank: 4

Post time 2005-12-6 20:06:33 |Display all floors

here is a quote

from one of those links


"(6") NARRATION POLICE INSIDE CAR/PEOPLE IN STREET Domestic violence is a common social problem especially in China's northeast provinces.

The traditional belief is that men are masters of the house, and many think they have the right to beat their wives"

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Rank: 8Rank: 8

Post time 2005-12-7 00:06:35 |Display all floors

ok...

I looked at it, and maybe there is more domestic abuse in China than in some countries, and I'm sure there are some countries worse than China. And I'm definitely sure that not EVERY man in China beats his wife.

There are people in America who also believe the man is master of the house and is therefore allowed to hit his wife. Some of them truly believe it's ok, and some know it's wrong but "can't help it" or whatever.  Sometimes action is taken, and sometimes the man makes the authorities believe he won't do it again and not much happens. Maybe some police beat their wives too and just warn him and let it go.

Personally, if I was dating a man in any country, I think I would know him long enough before marriage to know if he's like that or not. If he believes it's ok, it would be apparent before marriage.

I was glad to see the video you mentioned above. I'm glad to know the problem is being addressed publicly.

It's VERY important for a woman to know she has a place to go, as in the video. Many women are also afraid to report their husbands or leave, because they may get beaten worse. So the numbers of abuse are probably more than we think in every country.

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Rank: 4

Post time 2005-12-7 08:01:44 |Display all floors

i can not ask

You see he has never talked openly to me about his feelings.He is only making hints.So I don't dare to ask him this question .Sometimes I think that he sees the whole story as a game.I don't know and I suffer a lot.Which devil has put this virus into my mind to be in love through internet with an unknown guy 10 years younger than me.It is ridiculous but I can not fight it.

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Post time 2005-12-7 08:22:55 |Display all floors

my answer to ashguy

You see I can not ask him straight about his feelings considering my age because our affair in only through internet.He has not talked to me openly he is just making hints all the time.Sometimes I believe that he is simply play a game with me but some others I feel that he shares similar feelings with me.You see how Can I dare to ask him.What a bad luck for me to be in love with an unknown chinese guy 10 years younger than me.It is shame on me.

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Rank: 8Rank: 8

Post time 2005-12-7 09:40:22 |Display all floors

evapapa

I didn't realize you've never met him. I don't think it's impossible for you to be in love, but I certainly think you shouldn't decide anything until you meet and spend a good amount of time with him in person.

Don't think that because he isn't saying he loves you that it means anything. Perhaps he's not saying it because he's never actually met you and therefore can't be sure.

Have you suggested that you two meet? Tell him that you like him a lot and want to meet him in person.

Don't worry about deciding anything until you meet. That's my advice.

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Rank: 6Rank: 6

Post time 2005-12-8 15:34:34 |Display all floors

Hi, evapapa, everything is possible.

Can a chinese man be in love with a western woman 10years older than him?
--- Possible.

Can age be a barrier for a chinese man?

---- also possible.
In most cases, Chinese men would like to choose the lovers younger than them,  3-5 years older than them are also acceptable.  

But the most important thing is the love. If he loves you, there will be no age barrier, i think.

My suggestion is to ask him directly if he loves you. Chinese men are usually shy to express themselves.  If you kick the ball, i think you will get the response. Chinese ppl think it natural for foreigners to speak straightward.   So don't be so shy to ask first.

Besides, men all over the world are the same. some derserve respect and love, but some don't.   Just be careful since they haven't met till now.

Best wishes to you ,evepapa.

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