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zpiqin, zpiqin ...
Reading your post I am not sure you figured out what I mean with "special announcements". I mean announcements for a "sexpartner", as there people are making choices according your body shape and so on.
Anyway I will correct your translation:
First, the English word "you" has two meanings in German. A formal and informal meaning.
Between friends or in a relaxed situation, like between people of the same age or with the same interests, and also to people you can call them by there first name you say "Du" - informal way.
To person you don't know, person of a higer social rank, person who do not tell you to call them by their first name you say "Sie" - formal way.
I will correct it to both situations. The formal one will be within [...].
>>> We choose friends by personalites, not by sizes, because we don't have bed space to entertain friends at home.
Sorry, what do you mean exactly with this sentence? I ask, because for entertainment you do not need "bed space" normally in case you do not mean "special entertainment".
Anyway I try following:
Wir waehlen unsere Freunde nach Charakter und nicht nach deren Groesse, da wir nicht genuegend Betten zum Uebernachten haben.
...in English: "We choose our friends by character and not by their size, because we do not have enough beds for them zu stay overnight." OK?
>>> You can bring along your sleeping bag to sleep in the corridor?
Du kannst deinen Schlafsack mitbringen, um am Flur zu schlafen.
[Sie koennen Ihren Schlafsack mitnehmen, um am Flur zu schlafen.]
>>> I'm afraid my weak-sighted grandpa would kick your ass when he goes to toilet.
Ich befuerchte aber, dass mein schlecht sehender Grossvater Deinen Hintern tritt, wenn er auf die Toilette geht.
[Ich befuerchte aber, dass mein schlecht sehender Grossvater Ihren Hintern tritt, wenn er auf die Toilette geht.]
>>> You don't have a donkey?
Du hast keinen Esel?
[Sie haben keinen Esel?]
I do not know what you mean. I think you wrote "Esel" because you translated "ass" as "Esel" but this is wrong. "Ass" can be translated as "Hintern" (very polite) or "Arsch" (very unpolite).
So, maybe the translation wil be
"Hast Du einen Hintern?
[Haben Sie einen Hintern?]"
However zpiqin, I recommend not to post what you intend to post before it is clear what you want to post in German. And, posting this as answer to the thread you mentioned at the beginning...it's not worth!
a n d r e a s / 安迪