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Re: to stay a virgin when u can untill marriage is a gud thing..
No, it isn't.|
"1.U respect your mom coz she wants u to have a safe sex after marriage(when the guy can be responsible for ur baby and urself) and a good healthy life."
Incidentally, the Western freedom coincides with the advent of safe contraceptives and the liberation of the woman. You CAN have safe sex without being married. And you CAN have UNSAFE sex while being married, because the guy (usually) screws others (in China this is most likely to be his 姘头or a KTV 小姐, sometimes a massage girl).
Besides, your MOM has NOTHING to do with YOUR sexuality. It is YOURS, and yours ONLY.
"2.U respect your guy.. the guy u will be married to. i think he will be proud of u for staying clean,being patient waiting for the right guy that that is him and for not giving up ur virginity on sum random guy that u think is gud enuf to waste ur virginity on."
Why would you want to respect the guy when he in all likelihood will not reciprocate? That is, HE in most likelihood will not respect you by keeping HIS virginity til the marriage day.
And why do you think keeping the virginity is respecting this FUTURE guy, of whom you know nothing about? I'd say that keeping your virginity is to DISRESPECT him, since you will be untrained and therefore less satisfying to him in sexual matters. Of course, if both are untrained and thinks that sex is five minutes of quick coitus starting at the age of 24, then I guess it is OK...
"3.U resPect the old beliefs&chinese traditions.. i'm a chinese blooded but indonesian,i'm a christian. but i stil respect the chinese old traditions,though sometimes they're against the christian beliefs, but i still do it out of respect for my parents who are real chinese"
Well, I am neither Chinese nor Christian (nor anything else, for that matter), so my viewpoint is that traditions are oftentimes just a burden, since they reflect OLDER thinking that does NO LONGER APPLY. Christianity, for instance, has this sex taboo in its teachings because of historical reasons. You see, in the height of the Greco-Roman times, people were having free sex just as they have today, and even worse. But in those times, there was no modern medicine, and there was no social safety for women, who were considered unfree. Thus, the two main problems with sex -- unwanted pregnancy and disease -- were creating a social problem, which Christianity took upon its shoulder to rid.
Today, modern medicine -- and safe contraceptives exist, and in many places the women are free. Thus, the only thing that is making Chinese traditions valid is the fact that women has not yet been fully liberated in China; she is still in the harness of her 老公 and other patriarchal figures until she can support herself and her baby (most can't in today's China).
Tradition itself is not worth considering; it merely takes listing some bad traditions (such as bound feet) to realize this.
"4.U respect God..this is a christian belief. staying a virgin before marrige means not having sex untill marriage..In the bible,it says so."
Sorry, but there is no God. Even if you think so, you should consider the historical outline above and the reasons to why Christianity intereferes in people's sex life.
"5.last but not lease... u Respect urself.... after all u face urself each night reviewing the things u've done..and u don't wanna look back on this topic and regret.. aite?"
Yeah, you should respect yourself. You should realize that you have the right to experiment on you own and discover your own sexuality, slowly learning what is good for you and what your preferences are. This will enable you to choose a man that fits you sexually as well as mentally, rather than just facing the facts after being married a while. This is what sexual freedom in the West is all about, since people in the West also get married and give their bodies to a single person.
I often wonder... those who keep their virginity until marriage and regret their choice (if indeed they have a choice) afterwards, what do they do?