Author: sabrinafly

Does the westerner really love chinese woman or man???? [Copy link] 中文

Rank: 4

Post time 2005-8-20 20:59:48 |Display all floors

Ohhhhh...

Except that the Chinese man I love is not my husband.  I am white American woman who doesn't love her white American husband.  But the Chinese man I met...he is the finest guy I've ever known.

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Rank: 4

Post time 2005-8-24 09:56:31 |Display all floors

here we go again

Can x love y?
Is all a different to b?
Does a person with white skin really care about a  person with yellow skin?
If a, then b: a, therefore, b.
The same logic, the same circular arguments and the usual limpwristed liberal do-gooders versus the highly offended locals.
For gods sake, will you all grow up?
Some people of different cultures get along very well, some dont. Its as simple as that.
I know some white people who married Chinese people and it worked out. I know others who had terrible relationships and ended in divorce.
The answer is nothing to do with race, colour, culture or any other moronic variable that seems to fascinate you people. The answer is in the individual hearts of the SPECIFIC people involved in the SPECIFIC relationship.
Why do people insist on thinking they can explain love among the different races, when most people struggle to explain why love works between anyone at all?

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Rank: 4

Post time 2005-8-24 10:13:45 |Display all floors

re: here we go again

Agreed!  I don't think it is a question of whether or not love can exist between people, I think what is being discussed here (though not effectively) is whether or not cultural differences are a serious impediment to maintaining loving relationships.  I can't decide whether or not it is really an issue.  On the one hand, love is really more about committment than anything else.  So it isn't so much a matter of whether one's love feelings last, or how "real" they are, but rather a matter of whether or not you are a person who keeps committments and is willing to work at them even for their own sake once the "love" fades.  Ethnic Culture, it seems to me, doesn't really play a role in that...though perhaps some ethnic groups might be more inclined toward longer marriages.  I really don't know.  However, the cultural differences, in some cases, might ultimately put intense stress on the relationship to the poing where someone who really does love their mate feels unable to sustain a life together.

I am not in love with a Chinese guy just because he is Chinese.  I love him because he is...him...himself.  Being Chinese is a big part of who he is, but no one can be reduced to simply their ethnicity!

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Rank: 1

Post time 2005-8-26 13:20:33 |Display all floors

My opinion

I think a westerner can fall in love a Chinese woman or man,vice versa.Because love depends on feeling.Nothing is important when feeling comes.
But on the other hand,it is very hard for a pair of lovers to get married and get along with each other,unless they know culture and history of each other 's country  very well and like them.
Of course ,there are some pretended feelings which one part cheats the other,or both cheat each other for the purpose of certain motive.This is not love.

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Rank: 1

Post time 2005-8-27 13:37:36 |Display all floors

yes.

my bother has a very beautiful English wife. they have two lovely kids, now stay in China.

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Rank: 1

Post time 2005-8-27 17:21:39 |Display all floors

yours opinion is great .........

dear you r right love does not depend upon ethnicity. it does depend upon people falling in love with each other.

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Rank: 4

Post time 2005-8-28 05:29:30 |Display all floors

Right!

So let the racists, biggots, and nay-sayers be damned.  We will all be in love with whomever we desire!  If it works out for some then maybe the question is settled for some.  If it does not work out for others then maybe you just made a bad match.  I think stress of different cultures can cause some trouble, and maybe put too much pressure on relationship, but I don't think it has much to do with whether or not you can feel real love when east meets west.  Even now, when I am upset, maybe even broken-up with my Chinese boyfriend I know that some difficulties are maybe from our cultural differences, but some are just from our personalities.  I would definitely date another Chinese man or from any other culture if we met and fell in love.  There are challenges, and some prove too hard, but it works out enough times.

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