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- At a cocktail party, one woman said to another, 'Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?' The other replied, 'Yes, I am, I married the wrong man.'
- My wife's jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was.
- After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, 'You know, I was a fool when I married you.' The husband replied, 'Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice.'
- A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: 'Wife wanted' . Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: 'You can have mine.'
- When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
- The only thing worse than a man you can't control is a man you can. Margo Kaufman
- Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.
- There is no reciprocity. Men love women, women love children, children love hamsters. Alice Thomas Ellis