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Thursday, April 30, 2009|
My sister came and stayed with me for several days, she is 10 years younger than me and so she is only 17 years old, I look at her skin, figure and innocent smile, I sighed:” how wonderful if I can go back to my age at 17s.”
I was already went out for job for one year when I was in my 17s, at that time I was not in luck, I know nothing and I can work only as labor worker, my job is tough and I can’t enjoy my life at all, sometimes I feel the world is dangerous and so once I have the idea of going suicide.
When my sister at her 17s, she has two brothers and one sister that love her, they are all ready to offer helping hand to whatever she asks for. She has nothing to worry about. It is a shame for me to admit that I am kind of envy her, that in a big family and in the middle of the child, even that my mother asked her to withdraw from the school and look for a job, however we don’t agree with that and support her schooling.
From my mind, that I am very old now, my golden time has been passed, when I looked back for what I did at my young hood, and I asked myself:” am I regretting for what I do at the pass?” The answer is no, maybe I chose the wrong direction, maybe I am inexperience and done the wrong thing, but I don’t regret.
I feel I am young again when I am with her, at the same time I feel like I am cheating myself with my actual age, can I be young again?