Author: Andy99

My Chinese Girlfriend Troubles. [Copy link] 中文

Rank: 4

Post time 2009-1-21 19:17:20 |Display all floors
I forgot to add this.

4- People in love that are not spoiled do not expect the other person to change for them. They are wiling to change (within reason) themselves.

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Rank: 1

Post time 2009-1-22 09:11:36 |Display all floors
Thank you everyone for your opinions.

First of all she and her family are not native to shanghai, and yep, I have also heard the many assumptions on shanghai girls. haha. I understand the chinese culture of things in the fact that chinese gf's  shouldn't visit bf's house so much. I understand, and if i had a daughter i wouldnt want her to go round her bfs a lot either. But is twice too many times in 2 years?? i am not sure on that 1. Everything that everyone has said I have heard all before from friends and family.. i guess i am kinda stupid for not taking action. the problem is is that just seems like every time i see her i am happy i am just happy being with her. Apart from the obvious problems she is a great girl. I have talked to her recently about these things and I hope that she can understand my feelings towards my family and her. At the moment i am working a full time badly paid job at a ---- place so i can visit her every week as she lives quite far away from me but to be honest (i know it sounds pathetic) but as long as i can see her nothing in the world matters. But I know if things continue the way  they are with my family the future will not be very sunny. I still have hope with my relationship with her and I believe things will get better, i just think its a matter of time. I guess i am not afraid of getting hurt.  I just really want to see things through to the end..

Farewell2008 I appreciate you registering a user name for this post! thanks! It is good to have an opinion from someone who has had first hand experience with shanghai girls.. i understand what your trying to say.  and also would like to wish you and everyone a happy spring festival and happy Chinese new year!

something I want to ask everyone though. Is the chinese culture and the way of thinking in Hong Kong different to mainland china? I think not, but can anyone tell me the differences if so.. ?? my girlfriend always that there is quite a difference.. and i always disagree. In my opinion we are all chinese.. all our thinking is based on the same principles. right??

zhong gou jia you! haha

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Rank: 4

Post time 2009-2-9 11:59:35 |Display all floors
Originally posted by Andy99 at 2009-1-18 12:22
I have been seeing my girlfriend which is from China (Shanghai).  


Enough said! Shanghai girls are ruthless and heartless, and really professional at what they do.

My BBC friend got married to a Shanghai woman back in the late 90's. They had a baby, and after she got the British passport, and without any warning, within 3 days, she emptied his bank account, left the baby and came back to China! Now she is kinda rich and married to a white guy in Shenzhen.

Any Shanghai girl that is slightly above average pretty, will use her looks to get to a guy with money. Money and passport are the only two objectives they have.

Over the last few years, the pretty and tall Dongbei girls are slowly-slowly moving towards that direction too.

Let her go, and meet a nice BBC girl.

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Rank: 6Rank: 6

Post time 2009-2-9 12:18:03 |Display all floors
Originally posted by Andy99 at 2009-1-18 12:22
Hi,

I am a BBC (British Born Chinese) living in the UK and for about 2 years now I have been seeing my girlfriend which is from China (Shanghai). She came over to study and we have known each ot ...

Hi, Andy99,

I am sorry to hear this, but I have to say that it has nothing to do with the Chinese Culture. In China, when a boy and a gril fall in love, if the boy invites the girl to his family, it means that the boy wants to have formal relationship and long-term relation ship with this girl, and vice versa. So you have to realize the fact: I think that your girlfreind is not loving you deeply and truely.
I am sorry to say this, but I can read this according to the descpritions that you have listed above. So I suggest you'd better have a deep and true conversation with her, and get to know how she is thinking about the future of you two. Good luck.

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Rank: 4

Post time 2009-2-9 14:59:35 |Display all floors
the situation is not caused by culture differece.
u should try again for the last time if u love her.
u could invent her and ur parents to have a meet outside ur house,
a restaurant,a teahouse...
if she still refuse ,in my opinion,the love between she and u should be over now.
best wishes.

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Rank: 4

Post time 2009-2-12 17:25:35 |Display all floors
Originally posted by Andy99 at 2009-1-18 12:22
Hi,

I am a BBC (British Born Chinese) living in the UK and for about 2 years now I have been seeing my girlfriend which is from China (Shanghai). She came over to study and we have known each ot ...


That is the problem with living in a racist Anglo society.

The white English people are racist.   The white English girls are racist.   The white English girls look down on Chinese boys,  so the Chinese boys have no choice but to find another Chinese girl to go out with.

I am a Swedish born Chinese/Tai wa nese,   and here in Sweden,  we do not have to worry about Shanghainese girls,  because the white Swedish people are not racist,  and most of the Chinese boys,  the large majority of the Chinese boys go out with white Swedish girls and end up getting married to white Swedish girls.

To be honest,  I have never looked at a Chinese girl in Sweden,   because there are so many beautiful white Swedish girls who love to go out with Chinese boys and who want to marry Chinese boys.

However,  eventually,  I do not plan to get married to a white Swedish girl,  because I do not plan to live in Europe.

I plan to go back and live in Asia,  therefore,  I will probably end up getting married to a Tai wa nese girl.

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Rank: 1

Post time 2009-2-13 11:11:08 |Display all floors
chinpatriot,

I don't think my issue is about racism and I think that ur comments are totally irrelevant to the issue which is being discussed. Personal opinion I think that you are racist in saying that "The white English people are racist.   The white English girls are racist" how can you generalise to such an extent?   I know many many white English Anglo people which are not racist.  People who think this way is the exact reason why there is still racism in the world. So you totally contradicted yourself in your comment.

So please leave your ignorant narrow minded comments off this forum and grow up.

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