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need some advise about my shanghaiese Girlfriend [Copy link] 中文

Rank: 4

Post time 2008-10-25 00:54:33 |Display all floors
HI ALL
first of all, im new here, just heard alot of topics about girls from Shanghai, so i would just make a post here.
i live in Canada, im from HK orginally, and i have a girlfriend from Shanghai. i date for for almost a yr now.
First of all, i know she is a bit materialistic and such, so whenever she ask me to buy this and that, i will buy.  (e.g. bought her some expensive purses, $3000+, watch, clothes etc)
i dont have a problem buying ----, but all the time she will say, "ok, if you dont buy this, you dont Love me at all"
and i kind of feel sick because Love is not suppose to measure by how much money im willing to spend on you.  However, i have been trying to explain this to her, and she dont get it, all she said is "im like this, all shanghai girls are like this, whenever we go out, the guy will pay, and buy them ----"
and she is in canada right now, but she is going back to SH for a month or 2, and i always wanted her to come back to canada, i guess i love her too much, but she told me one day, "if you want me to come back, you need to do one thing, which is when i come back, you need to give me all your credit cards, and debit cards, bank account etc, beucase im going to marry you"

after i heard that, i am so disappointed, is she just lack of securities? or the culture in Shanghai is just like that??

if anyone can give me some opinions, i will be greatly appreciated.

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Rank: 4

Post time 2008-10-25 04:38:35 |Display all floors
Hi bimmerm3x5:

Well, sorry, but I think you got mixed up with a bad one and it is not because she is from Shanghai. My wife is from Shanghai and when she first came to Canada to visit me, I offered to pay for the ticket, but she said  no, she'd prefer to pay for it herself.

When she was still just my girlfriend, I got the impression from her that she was interested in building an emotional and economic partnership with me, not just draining me. I've met a lot of girls and women in my wife's former Shanghai circle of friends and family, and almost all of them are good people.

Now, I do feel that maybe being Shanghainese, my wife has way too big an interest in shoes, clothing, and other fashion accessories, but she doesn't really go crazy that way and she spends her own money.

The only accurate generalisation that I've heard about Shanghai women is:

                 "Shanghai women:    they take good care of you - but they try to control you!"

I think your best bet is to drop this woman - it sounds like she is draining you. I'm sorry to hear you have this bad situation.

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Rank: 4

Post time 2008-10-25 12:43:56 |Display all floors
Originally posted by bimmerm3x5 at 2008-10-25 00:54
HI ALL
first of all, im new here, just heard alot of topics about girls from Shanghai, so i would just make a post here.
i live in Canada, im from HK orginally, and i have a girlfriend from Shang ...

hi, friend, i am sorry to hear your situation too
you know not all shanghai girls like your honey. really.
and i hope you will not mistake shanghai girls  just only from what your gf does
not every one likes to rely on her bf or husband, they are very undependent nowsdays
i don't deny that most of them may like fashionable things, but that cann't mean they are very materialistic
coz they can afford such things by themselves. here, repeat,i want to you not have any prejudice on shanghai girls,ok
maybe your honey is just an exception .
by the way , i suggest you guy be more calm and smart on your marriage....
anyway, best wishes to you. good luck

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Rank: 4

Post time 2008-10-25 12:44:16 |Display all floors
Originally posted by bimmerm3x5 at 2008-10-25 00:54
HI ALL
first of all, im new here, just heard alot of topics about girls from Shanghai, so i would just make a post here.
i live in Canada, im from HK orginally, and i have a girlfriend from Shang ...

hi, friend, i am sorry to hear your situation too
you know not all shanghai girls like your honey. really.
and i hope you will not mistake shanghai girls  just only from what your gf does
not every one likes to rely on her bf or husband, they are very undependent nowsdays
i don't deny that most of them may like fashionable things, but that cann't mean they are very materialistic
coz they can afford such things by themselves. here, repeat,i want to you not have any prejudice on shanghai girls,ok
maybe your honey is just an exception .
by the way , i suggest you guy be more calm and smart on your marriage....
anyway, best wishes to you. good luck

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Rank: 4

Post time 2008-10-25 23:20:54 |Display all floors

Reply #1

if you hang out with her as a playmate,just enjoy the relationship... if you're looking for a serious relationship...you'd better split up

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Rank: 1

Post time 2008-10-26 11:30:10 |Display all floors
ummm,if i had been in such a situation,,the relationship would have been finished by now

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Rank: 4

Post time 2008-10-26 14:56:21 |Display all floors
".. will buy.  (e.g. bought her some expensive purses, $3000+, watch, clothes etc)..."

mate if i were u i would dump this girl... u can get a equally nice gf w/o throwing good money away.
shanghai girls are all about money ... she would probably ask for a house next...
Chinese by blood, Kiwi by law :D

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