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How to Heal and Move On After Breaking Someone's Heart (e-c)practice [Copy link] 中文

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Post time 2008-1-7 15:02:59 |Display all floors
Heartbreaker 101: How to Heal and Move On After Breaking Someone's Heart

By Lisa Steadman, The Relationship Journalist

Given the choice, most people say they would much rather break up with someone than get broken up with. But if you've recently initiated a breakup, you know how tough it can be.

Just because you summoned the courage to end your dead-end relationship doesn't mean you're not feeling a little heartache yourself (or experiencing some guilt for causing your ex heartache). But fear not, my brave friend. You are not alone. Following are some do's and don'ts that should make moving on that much easier.

  在有选择的条件下大多数人宁愿“去甩别人”也不愿“被别人甩”。 但是,如果近来你甩了某人,那么就会知道那有多么难。


Don't: Call, email, text or visit your ex in a moment of weakness

Even though you brought on the breakup, there may still be times when you miss your ex. A song might come on the radio that reminds you of them. Something funny will happen and you'll want to share it. Or maybe you're just having a bad day and want to reach out and reconnect.

  即便是你提出分手,还是有可能在一些时候会想念对方。 一首收音机里传来的歌也许会勾起你对往日的回忆。你会希望同对方分享那些发生的好笑事情。或者也许你只不过是经历了不好的一天,希望同对方进行感情联系。

STOP RIGHT THERE. Missing your ex is one thing. Contacting your ex is a no-no. In fact, reconnecting with your ex is the absolute worst thing you can do right now. So before you have that moment of weakness, remove your ex's number from your cell phone, delete their email address, and take them off your social networking contacts. (Right now.)

  就此打住。 思念前任男/女友是一回事;但是联络对方则是”万不应该“。 实际上,联络对方在目前来说是最糟糕的一件事。

Do: Ask friends for help

Because you initiated the breakup, your friends may not know that you're hurting. But if you are, it's important to ask for help, a.k.a. recruit your Boo-Hoo Crew. You'll want to choose a least three friends who know you well enough to know when you need comfort versus when you need a kick in the pants.
Your Boo-Hoo Crew should always know (and be able to remind you) why your ex wasn't good for you then, and why they're definitely not worth pining over now.

  因为是你提出的分手,你的朋友可能不会知道你正在伤心。但是,如果你确实伤心,那么寻求帮助你很重要。 。。你将希望能有至少三名朋友。他们对你要十分了解,知道什么时候你需要安慰,什么时候需要“鞭笞”。你的”亲友团“应该一定要知道(并且能提醒你)为什么前任不适合你,为什么他/她不值得你”消得人憔悴“

Don't: Second-guess your decision

After a breakup, it's all too easy to second-guess yourself and your choices. Did I do the right thing? Should I have given him/her another chance? Maybe there was more I could do to make it work... The truth is, you can make yourself crazy second-guessing your decision. But what's done is done. You had your reasons, made your decision, and now it's time to accept and move on.

  分手后,一不留神就容易做事后自我批评,或批评做出的抉择。当时做对了吗?要不要给他/她令一次机会?也许我在感情上能更努力...其实,对当初的决定再去批评会让你疯掉。可是做了就做了。 你有自己的理由、做了自己的决定。现在是该接受它们、继续生活的时候了。

Do: See your breakup for what it really is

You may not know it right now, but in ending your relationship with the wrong person, you're paving the way to meet the right one. Chances are good that you won't meet Mr. or Ms. Right overnight, but that doesn't mean the breakup was a bad decision.


By walking away from that wrong relationship, you're headed towards a life that's more honest and authentic for you. What better way to eventually attract your perfect partner than by living and loving your own life?


Don't: Badmouth your ex

In the aftermath of a breakup it's all too easy to badmouth your ex, spilling their dirty little secrets to anyone who will listen. Don't do it. Badmouthing your ex may feel good momentarily, but the fallout from those harmless snarky comments can be detrimental to your healing process, not to mention your dating future. Breakup karma is a bitch you don't want coming after you, so zip the lip and move on with dignity.

  分手过后,容易说前任的坏话,把那些肮脏的小秘密泄露给愿意听的任何一个人。 不要那么做。说前任的坏话也许暂时会让你感觉很好,但是那些话造成的结果对你自己感情痊愈的过程有害的,跟不要说你将来的约会。分手的因果报应是你不想陪伴你左右的东西,所以把嘴闭上,带着尊严继续生活。

Do: Become a breakup rock star

And speaking of moving on, did you know that you can not only survive your breakup but actually thrive? By applying the lessons you learned from your last relationship, and refining what you want out of life and eventually from your perfect partner, you have the chance to reclaim yourself and become the ultimate breakup rock star. So go ahead, rock on!

  说到继续生活,你知道吗?你不但能承受分手经历,还能茁壮成长。 通过汲取上次恋爱中的教训,通过进一步了解自己对生活有什么要求,对”完美伴侣“有什么期待,你就有机会重新认识自己,成为一位”终极分手王“。 那么现在就行动吧~!

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Post time 2008-1-10 15:56:58 |Display all floors
what  a pity!
i have losted my first love ,so sadness
always miss her and the time with her
sometimes don't know how to deal with my love,
cross my heart,message her ,call  her,e-mail her !!thank you  your comment,
will become breakup rock star in 4 days......

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Post time 2008-1-11 23:31:14 |Display all floors
I ever be cheated by the man who I think he's my most love.

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Post time 2008-1-12 12:37:32 |Display all floors
Try to start a new relationship is the best way to heal.

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Post time 2014-7-7 17:18:20 |Display all floors
never say goodbye

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