Author: mary_zhang

Should I marry a man who is just broke? [Copy link] 中文

Rank: 4

Post time 2007-2-11 21:53:38 |Display all floors

Lower one's expectation....the only way to happiness???

Originally posted by greendragon at 2007-2-10 21:30

Happiness is all in the MIND.
If you take DRUGs, it can make you happy.
So theoritically, it's all in the mind.

If you can make an income, and if the boyfriend can p ...

Hi green dragon,
Nice to hear from you again.
My problem now is exactly how to balance the reality with my expectation.
Of course, I make an income, and my income can support both of us to survive, but I just feel too hard to accept this reality.
It is too far away from my expectation.
My parents have high expectation of me from my early age, which I have already got used to.
I believe an outstanding one should always have higher expectation of himself, but lower expectation of others.
To be frank, I have expectation of myself and I always strive hard for it.
I don't expect too much from him, but since he is the guy who will be combined with my future, I hope he can go with me shoulder to shoulder. Do I expect too much?
what should I do when the reality can't meet my expectation?
Is lowering my expectation the only way to happiness???

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Post time 2007-2-11 21:54:37 |Display all floors
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Post time 2007-2-12 13:50:29 |Display all floors
For every successful man, there is a  woman.... for every downfall man, there is another woman... May be should do some investigation.
When the going get tough... the tough get going....

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Post time 2007-2-12 14:37:44 |Display all floors

Reply #127 mary_zhang's post

The fact of the matter or the DEMON is EXPECTATIONS!

(This is the "kicker" and the main problem)

I have seen people with annual incomes of Rmb40,000 and people with Rmb800,000 complaining about money. (SERIOUSLY) Both says that they can only afford 2 child. The difference is EXPECTATION, wherease the Rmb40,000 per year couple intend to use STATE RUN SCHOOLs and University for their kids...the other family wanted to send the two daughters to a PRIVATE BOARDING SCHOOL in Kuala Lumpur.

ha ha ha

See, two incomes level...both could only say that they can only afford 2 kids! (In China, it would be 1 kid...i guess)

So, YOU MUST LEARN to adjust your "EXPECTATIONS" in order to remain happy!
If you can MANIPULATE "your expectation standards", life is that much happier!


Green Dragon

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Post time 2007-2-12 14:44:48 |Display all floors

A Question for you!

Are you happy driving a QQ car or are you only happy if you can afford a BMW 320i?

Are you happy staying in a suburban 100s.m. apartment instead of a Rmb1.2 million 120 s.m. city centre apartment.

Are you happy eating in home cook meals everyday and spending only Rmb500 monthly on household expense for you, your spouce and that "lonely" 1 kid.
Or Do you need to eat OUT everyday and spend Rmb5,000 a month on meals alone?

Are you jealous when you see somebody wearing EXPENSIVE JEWELRY, branded shoes, watches?
Or Are you happy playing parlour games with your kids?

Do you really need to go to a LIVE MUSIC BAR with a real life JAZZ SINGER accompanied a 3 piece band to have your daily beer?
Or is watching a football match and a can of beer "happiness" for you?


Green Dragon

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Post time 2007-2-12 14:47:50 |Display all floors

Actually i have done both....'s only when I have a "pretty gal" that "look interested in me"....that i get the KICK!


Geeeeze, Mary Cheong, you are actually the "Wealth" to the man!

Green Dragon

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Post time 2007-2-13 16:28:21 |Display all floors
Originally posted by mary_zhang at 2007-1-30 16:11
We have a very long and romantic love story. We first met on line, then he left his hometown and moved to my city, 3000km away, coz I was a university students at that time. We had a really happy 3 ...

It seems that the answer have been come out, and i am sure you'll be sorry for not married him.
Before you get married, you'd better get ready to accept all the difficulties coming up to both of you~~As long as you have enough faith in your BF's love.
May you are happy in the future~~:)

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