Author: aiwoai

Being with a white man [Copy link] 中文

Rank: 4

Post time 2006-6-23 03:35:19 |Display all floors
You have the right to feel worried, after all, marriage is a big dicision in your life.

i was wondering if you two could hold off the marriage plan until you have a better economic base.

just a thinking.

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Post time 2006-6-23 05:37:43 |Display all floors
Originally posted by aiwoai at 2006-6-22 01:57

I want to share my little feeling. My bf is from west europe. He recently talks about marriage.  I asked how much he earned a month(just around 14000 rmbs after tax per month). And the amount upsets me of course.  After that, I had nightmares every night about marriage. I don't want to get married now.   But it's like I accepted already...   I don't love him for his money but I am easily discouraged/ getting a feeling of insecurity if I know something that can hardly work.

I told my friends about that and they say I'm greedy. They say I shouldn't expect too much from a white guy. I admit that he gives all he has to me and he doesn't mind me having no job in his country in future. But with his tiny salary, I can imagine what's our future.    I feel guilty that I mind about money but at the same time I reeally shurrder when I think about the future after marriage with my bf.


You are trolling, right? 14,000 after tax (taxes in Europe are in the 30%-ish bracket) means his salary is 19000 before taxes. The median income in France (before taxes) should be around 20-22,000. It is 24,000 in Sweden, for a comparison.

So his 14000 after tax is a normal income, amounting to some NINE times the average salary in Shanghai...

If you just want a rich dude, go for a dakuan. They are more common in China then laowais with piles of money.
瑞典人,活着为中国娃娃而死。汉学家、工程师、摄影师、网页设计师等等。爱好:政治、历史、科技、文化等。王菲迷。自由主义者。

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Post time 2006-6-23 14:43:16 |Display all floors
i agree u, don't get marriage. marriage always change ur life, to more unhappy.

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Post time 2006-6-23 16:34:17 |Display all floors
Originally posted by canadian45 at 2006-6-22 02:33
It is curious that he is from France but his after-tax income is quoted in pounds. His income does sound very low, especially if he lives in a city of any size.

Marriage plans should can be canc ...


I do agree with you. If you feel it reluctant or doubt in heart , pls cancel it

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Post time 2006-6-23 16:39:45 |Display all floors
Originally posted by liangzai at 2006-6-23 05:37


You are trolling, right? 14,000 after tax (taxes in Europe are in the 30%-ish bracket) means his salary is 19000 before taxes. The median income in France (before taxes) should be around ...


My Denish friend employed as an international safety specialist on constructers get his salary as follows: RMB15000 plus USD15000 per month. It's not impolite to expose it here. It seems to be a big volumn, but sorry he's scheduling his wedding now

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Post time 2006-6-23 23:16:28 |Display all floors

Post 41 and 48

Hi Aiwoai,

Suggest you read Eyeofthestorms reply to my post. It provides very keen insights to the situation. I appreciate eyeofthestorms observation that my comments may have been one-sided and not considering aiowai's bf opinion. Not to go off the subject but it is interesting that aiowai and EOTS both did not comment on what I said, "Love always involves sacrifice" Aiwoa, are you willing to sacrifice your fears and your expectations and "Stand by your man?" Sacrifice is acceptable, compromise of your beliefs will lead to unhappiness. If you review the postings, there are some that are judgemental. In America, some might label you a "rincess" type. I want this, and I want that. The question becomes, what are you giving to the relationship? What is more important, your love for bf, or your love of your personal expectations of marriage. One of life's interesting questions is, What to do? What to do?
For Eye of the Storm. I liked your comments, even though there is a difference of opinion  It is one reason I enjoy this forum so much. It is said that you can not teach an old dog new tricks. This forum keeps my mind fresh. Hint: Think Tiger38.
Regards to all on this thread. I appreciate and enjoy the comments.
pastorbob

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Post time 2006-6-23 23:20:11 |Display all floors

What to do = how to do? :)

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