Author: aiwoai

Being with a white man [Copy link] 中文

Rank: 8Rank: 8

Post time 2006-6-22 21:52:12 |Display all floors
hey..it seems that all you can see in this relationship is money...make sure u do dig gold out of it!

i hope you can grow up a bit....in a relationship..its not just matter..more to the point..its about love...commitment..money is really not a big thing...i mean...he works..and u have hands and feet..after you graduate..you can get a job and work!..sky is the limit..u never know what kinda future u will have if u dont give a go!!!....

Ps
if you really just wanna money..i dont mind introduce some to you...if u dont mind they are older..and ugly...u can have indeed a simple easy life...can cruisine in the harbour every day..and drive lexus...is tht wat u want??.....
I don't know if I like you or love you, want you or need you, all I know is I love the feeling I get when I'm near you.

Use magic tools Report

Rank: 6Rank: 6

Post time 2006-6-22 22:28:41 |Display all floors
Originally posted by tmphgt at 2006-6-22 20:35


Have you ever been to France? (I don't think so ...)

How long have you known this man? Have you ever lived with him? Is he much older than you?

So, it is good that you think about the cos ...


sf, u win again! u have my full support!!

Use magic tools Report

Rank: 1

Post time 2006-6-22 23:57:46 |Display all floors

why girls make a fuss

just because he is white European man?No.....

Use magic tools Report

Rank: 8Rank: 8

Post time 2006-6-22 23:59:42 |Display all floors
who knows....never like europeans....as my lecturer told us...most europeans in china are bastards...ahah...actually himself is a european...lol.....
I don't know if I like you or love you, want you or need you, all I know is I love the feeling I get when I'm near you.

Use magic tools Report

Rank: 1

Post time 2006-6-23 00:04:20 |Display all floors

My reply

#49, thanks a lot. I find your answer the most thoughtful.  I asked him about that and he said his wage is average in there.  He doesn't seem to think it's a problem at all.  And this makes the situation harder.  

#51, I have been to france(did you read my earlier post? we spent time together in both china and france) and of course stayed with him. I have been with him for two years. He's 25 years old.  Everything seems good. He looks handsome and he's absolutely a good and caring lover.  

When I was in france, I always had to depend on my boyfriend as I could do nothing. I felt I was so useless.  You never could imagine how much I feared inside.  Why should I be a small coward just for being unable to speak french, when I can be a self-surviving, charming, intelligent  woman in China?   Anyway, I think I will tell him that I want him to change another job with higher salary.

Use magic tools Report

Rank: 6Rank: 6

Post time 2006-6-23 00:42:40 |Display all floors
#49, thanks a lot. I find your answer the most thoughtful.  I asked him about that and he said his wage is average in there.  He doesn't seem to think it's a problem at all.  And this makes the situation harder.  


I think pastorbobs answer is only thoughful on your behalf. However, he does not take much consideration toward your partners situation. He wants to be practical yet his expectation along with yours of life is not aligned with your boyfriends current status (considering his wage is 'average' not the best but not the worst either)

I have been with him for two years. He's 25 years old.  Everything seems good. He looks handsome and he's absolutely a good and caring lover.


I do not think you should underestimate him because first he is your lover. Therefore, he is your star and needs you to provide him confidence and support as he does the same to you.  Granted, he is 25 years old, if you were near sighted or myopic with your future together then you cannot see the great potential in that. Now back to being practical, at 25 years of age you cannot expect him to be some sort of large manager, executive nor VP of some company. He has to work his way up from the bottom of the ladder just like the majority of the people.

When I was in france, I always had to depend on my boyfriend as I could do nothing.

I dont see how you can change that since from what I remember, you make 0 and do not have a job even in China.

Why should I be a small coward just for being unable to speak french, when I can be a self-surviving, charming, intelligent  woman in China?

This should be your main concern, because the cultural differences in France and the fact that you cannot speak the language..

Anyway, I think I will tell him that I want him to change another job with higher salary.

Wait a minute, I thought your a practical person? Mind you, you cannot just have him change a job with a higher salary like changing clothing. He needs the proper qualifications and credentials to be able to get jobs with higher position and of course higher wages. (I do not know his qualifications so I really cannot fully comment on that but merely give an advice)
((EyeOfStorm))
~All that which glitters is not gold~

Use magic tools Report

Rank: 8Rank: 8

Post time 2006-6-23 02:25:14 |Display all floors

Ah ...

Originally posted by aiwoai at 22-6-2006 04:04 PM
#51, I have been to france(did you read my earlier post? we spent time together in both china and france) and of course stayed with him. I have been with him for two years. He's 25 years old.  Everything seems good. He looks handsome and he's absolutely a good and caring lover.  


Sorry I missed the bit about going to France. If you have been there then that is good since you have sampled the life there.

However you are still young and when you graduate you will have many more choices and options. You should consider all of those too.

Originally posted by aiwoai at 22-6-2006 04:04 PM
When I was in france, I always had to depend on my boyfriend as I could do nothing. I felt I was so useless.  You never could imagine how much I feared inside.  Why should I be a small coward just for being unable to speak french, when I can be a self-surviving, charming, intelligent  woman in China?   Anyway, I think I will tell him that I want him to change another job with higher salary.


No, you cannot tell him what to do. Stop thinking about money. People in the West are not usually as open about their salary and money as people in China.

You cannot say that you will be "self-surviving" since this totally contradicts the spoilt life you have already said that you have now.

If you decide to give up everything and I mean EVERYTHING (your family, friends, future career) for him then you must accept him as he is. Don't not try to mould him just for your needs.

If you want a future with him then you must learn to adapt:
1) learn to speak French
2) learn about his culture
3) be prepared for a huge culture shock
4) be prepared to be lonely and isolated
5) be prepared to work hard on the relationship

Forget about his money. Instead focus on what you really want: do you want to be with this man or do you want to build a career in China first?

If you want to be with him them you will have to adapt to his culture and lifestyle.

Sure, there will be a period of time when you cannot work in France. However once you have the right working visa or permit you can get a job.

If you are unsure then wait. Wait and see what the future brings to you in China. You do seem to have some ideas about the real world but it would be good for you to learn more about how to survive on your own.

[ Last edited by tmphgt at 2006-6-22 06:31 PM ]
Take me down to the paradise city, where the grass is green and the girls are pretty

Use magic tools Report

You can't reply post until you log in Log in | register

BACK TO THE TOP
Contact us:Tel: (86)010-84883548, Email: blog@chinadaily.com.cn
Blog announcement:| We reserve the right, and you authorize us, to use content, including words, photos and videos, which you provide to our blog
platform, for non-profit purposes on China Daily media, comprising newspaper, website, iPad and other social media accounts.