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passionate, hands down
Originally posted by xilaren at 2006-5-4 07:17
'four months'?How can you be sure about this time limit?
Yes, I've read about it too, from many places, including psychologists, etc. It's a hormonal thing. For the first 3-4 months you get all those giddy child-like feelings, and/or lustful feelings, but they often fade. We should all know this, so people don't get hurt as much. If we all knew, and expected that a relationship might end after 3-4 months, we could be better prepared in our minds. If it's a person who is very dependent or with very low self-esteem, s/he might feel obliged to keep it going without realizing the feelings are fading. Not good.
I figure no one can know if it's true love for the first 4 months, and personally I'd give it WAY longer than that! LOL....
As for PASSIONATE vs. CONTROL...... hahaha.... Personally I like to FEEL things. I would rather have passion, knowing I will be heartbroken after, than to have nothing at all, or even very little. I have ONE LIFE to live, to my knowledge, so I want to experience all the emotions I can. I just remind myself that ALL those emotions are temporary. We cannot hold onto any of them. If you are buddhist, you know all about non-attachment. Attachment is when suffering occurs, when we think we HAVE something and it is OURS to keep forever. Nothing is ours forever, everything changes. If we keep this in mind, we can enjoy passion and excitement and love, without keeping our expectations up. Then we won't be let down later, because we knew all along it would be temporary.
I like to savor every moment I can.