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Overcoming Fear

Viewed 1648 times 2018-1-18 20:43 |System category:Life

No-one likes to have fear, it is uncomfortable. It seems it was  designed to be a primal, instinctual response to physical danger. However, much of what we fear these days is not a fear of danger, of physical harm, but is often a fear of what might happen to us in our everyday life.

Fear of spiders, snakes, dogs, attack, height, flying etc are all based on valid could-be dangerous situations but generally they are dangerous situations if we are living in ancient times when man was nothing more than a caveman. They are not generally valid fears in our modern times.

Of course we have to be careful, of course we have to recognise there are dangers in every society, but it is the irrational fears which dont make sense in our current life circumstances which we do not need and can probably be dispensed with. These ones are the fears we need to address and which we can help ourselves by eliminating from our lives.
In a population of so many people, there are bound to be horror stories which are passed around but we do not have to focus on the worse ones. Take a note of them for later, understand the warning in them and then move on with your life. Passing on these horror stories is not constructive and only feeds the fear which you are trying to overcome and eradicate.

Self confidence seems to play a large part in determining who feels excessive fear. Those people who are confident and who feel safe in their environment are not those who feel fearful their life will be turned upside down or destroyed. For example, confident and assertive people do not fear their boss, they recognise that their boss also has his or her fears and worries just as we do. This may make the boss sometimes irritable, angry or frustrated at things in their life which they also cannot control. Human nature shows us that often people take out fears and frustrations by being angry and controlling of others.

Stress plays a major part in our life today and being in control of our own life is an important feeling. When we feel we are not in control it means we feel fearful. We do not know what is coming and how we will cope with it effectively, this causes us stress. So, fear and stress go hand-in-hand together and reducing one will reduce the other.

Fear is always a controlling mechanism. It limits what we do and how we approach situations. Excessive fear can literally make us freeze and become unable to think or move until the fear has passed. It is absolutely essential that we learn to overcome it.

So, what can we do?
We have to recognise that education, upbringing and culture has a part to play in every population and we need to accept that some cultures have grown up with a feeling of fear installed as 'normal'. However, we can still decide to examine our fears and find out which ones are real and which ones are imaginary or artificially heightened. There are still things we can do to reduce the stress-fear cycle and to play down the fear factor. By increasing our confidence and understanding ourselves better, we can take more control of our emotions and the effect they have on our actions.

Having a positive outlook on life is a great benefit to folks who feel fearful. Being grateful for what we have and the opportunities which arise can make us feel that our life is more secure and more stable. Feeling worry that disaster will happen can start a downward spiral into fear and depression. So, this suggests our life outlook should be as realistically positive as possible. Take a moment or two and find some strengths which each of us has. Recognise we are a useful and caring person who has something to offer the community. Start to focus on others rather than ourself and this will allow us realise how maybe we can help others in our group of family and friends.

Lastly, there is a technique which is free, called Emotional Freedom Technique(EFT). ( It was developed from other systems by Gary Craig in the USA. It uses the meridian energy system probably most well-known as used by Traditional Chinese Medicine in acupuncture, although meridian systems are also used by other healing methods.

EFT can be used by anyone and relies on the person tapping on energy points on the face, hands and upper body. It is probably best known for addressing fears which are irrational, excessive and which affect people strongly. It has been used to treat war veterans with success for Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, so it is a powerful and effective system.

I do not practice this (or any) method of healing but I have used EFT on myself in the past and I can probably help if you have problems understanding the instructions.

Gary Craig's website (
 Free Manual

EFT Universe Tutorial centre

EFT on 1-page

(Opinions of the writer in this blog don't represent those of China Daily.)




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