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How are we gonna live this life well?

Popularity 14Viewed 4140 times 2015-6-21 20:09 |System category:Life| potential, Twitter, Chinese


The famous Chinese Writer Hanhan once said on his Chinese Twitter like SNS Weibo:  We have learned too many lessons, but we still can't live our life well.


True, this is our life, our once, unforgettble, unique life, how do you define life? how to live? Is it tiresome to live life to its fullest potential?All these kinds of questions are spinning inside of my head lately, whether I can decode such enigmas will eventually lead to two extreme versions of me: a great philosopher or a total loser, yeah, nothing can be in between.




We all know that the world is interwoven, we are individuals living on this wonderful planet, but it seems a little bit confusing when it comes to the problems we may face in our daily life. We need to worry about things, things matter, things don't matter, and the degree of the worry actually can decide our happiness index.


For example, the latest thing for me is I need a car to go to work, and finacial support is needed from my dad, I like Huachen V3 a lot, which is quite cheap, and the car looks like land rover a lot, for a girl, it is enough, all I need is the look. When it comes to my mom, she is totally crazy into Chevron C4, which is two times dearer than V4, better equipment imported car from French, CHIC. My dad happened to have another idea, buy an Audi, but it may involve a lot of efforts on saving money, and the pressure of maintenance can bother me a lot.



But the thing is I just need a CAR to go to work!Superficial as I maybe,as long as the car has four full-motivated wheels, it is ok for me.While mom considers a lot on safety, dad thinks saving face has the utmost meaning of all, a car is more than a traffic tool from his point of view, it is a social status, the emblem of ability, the power of family property.


Firstly, for a common family, the cost of having a car like BMW and Audi is equal to raising a kid, my annual salary isn't enough to support such kinds of cars, and the thing that I want the least is still to be dependent on my parents while working as an adult who has economic independence. Secondly, I don't want to live a luxury life just on the outside of me, I am educated, and I am not a business woman who needs cars to represent my identity in this world, maybe others love it, maybe they need it ,but sorry, not me. Thirdly, I need to have a look at the world, materialistic stuff can really make me suffer, I want to see beautiful corners of France, I want to to go to California Beach, I want to see sunrise in Hawaii......too many unrealized dreams let me know that money should be allocated with plans in details, and I don't want cars to stop me from doing what I really like.


To some degree, Chinese parents are manipulators, I say this because I mean it seriously, I could be a representative of every Chinese but a painless moaner, I am saying this because I see the seriousness of changes we should make, I am not being ungrateful but because I know the parents shouldn't have the burdon on them considering we r induviduals with decent dignity. They want to control everything about u but at the same time pretending to give u the most uncomfortable freedom u don't want at all, and the worst part of it is even though I am trying to make a difference, being submissive has got me from within, I feel so weak, so desperate and helpless sometimes, and the feeling is devouring me when it comes to my hobbies, my friends, my dreams, my work, my room, my clothes, my poster, and my way of living.


The other day I went biking with my friend Cathy, who is a very coooool Canadian teacher here in China, we had the most lovely picnic on a spacious grassland somewhere faraway from the city, I asked her a stupid question: Can I sit on the ground?It was the moment she replied yes I can, did I realize how terrifying things have got this far!I ASK permissions all the time!!I wish I could be the master of my own life, I want to change, but the truth seems to be harder than I could possibly think of. Being a passive person is something deeply rooted inside of me, I am so afraid that it will go with me forever since there's no hope to grow out of it all of a sudden.


Some may mock me for being a spoiled brat, who has already had everything and is making opinions out of nothing, for me, this is far from being into a battle, I am not a loser at all just because I am aware of this and is trying to improve myself through various of ways. Instead of being stagnant and confused, I am really trying to organise clues in the mess. The awareness of the importance of self-fulfillment takes time for young people to understand, the more we experience, the more we may better solve all the issues on the way. After all, life is a journey, not a destination, we should enjoy every moment.


Let's break free, let's live, let's sing even though u may go out of the tune, let's dance though you may lose your balance, let's face the music bravely no matter it is rock or blue hahaha, everyone grows old by the passing of time, not everyone really lives! Keep yourself motivated everyday, and don't be afraid of being afraid, life is all about trying, because a long life may not be good enough, but a good life is long enough, dear ones, I wish u a happy holiday, and I wish there would be no regrets in the decisions u would make in the future.




(Opinions of the writer in this blog don't represent those of China Daily.)




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