Is it hard to get along with Chinese in-laws?http://www.globaltimes.cn/Portals/0/attachment/2018/2018-09-28/90efdd81-876f-4e9d-b864-005d892d66ab.jpegA foreign bridegroom holds a Chinese wedding in Ganzhou, Jiangxi Province. Photo: VCG
(Global Times) Cross-culture love with a Chinese could be romantic. Different cultures and backgrounds are shared between lovers. When you are planning to talk about marriage, however, pure, simple love could become more complex. Getting married means you're going to become a family member of your Chinese partner. And the first step you have to face is being accepted by their family. If you feel nervous and have no ideas about how to deal with your Chinese in-laws, here are some tips for you.
Language is the key point for you when it is time to meet with Chinese in-laws. When it comes to the big moment - meeting with parents, fluency can help you break the ice much easier and win parents over. Even when you encounter interference from the parents, it can help with communication. To Jocelyn Eikenburg, an American writer and blogger from Ohio, US, language could be the panacea to break negative stereotypes towards foreigners. In an email interview with Metropolitan, Eikenburg shared her experiences with us. "While I wouldn't say that all Chinese parents necessarily have negative stereotypes about foreigners, some do. If you can communicate with them, that goes a long way in winning over parents," said Eikenburg.
http://www.globaltimes.cn/Portals/0/attachment/2018/2018-09-28/f8cc5308-9179-4904-bcf6-091a92fc4aa5.jpegIn some circumstances, language doesn't seem so important. Rob Welham, a British photojournalist and writer, won over his parents in-law very smoothly. The first time he arrived at his wife's home in Kaiyuan, a small village in Yunnan Province, he was totally accepted by the whole family even though he couldn't speak Chinese, but just by being "my usual self," he said. "To a major degree, it also depends on your Chinese partner. Having a supportive Chinese partner in your corner, as I did, can really make a difference."
Meeting family members
If your Chinese in-laws have no plans to meddle in your relationship, it's the moment to meet with family members, especially during traditional Chinese festivals. When that moment comes, make sure that both you and your partner are ready. Also, it's important for you to know something about traditional Chinese culture in advance. It is possible that you will have a big dinner with many family members, so ask your partner about that and prepare some gifts for each of them. During dinner, avoiding touching is one of the most important things that cannot be ignored. "Here in China, love is something that is shown through action, such as making your favorite dinner or buying something special, and married Chinese men are less likely to kiss or hug their spouses in front of others," said Eikenburg.
As an expat, it is possible for you to encounter interference from your Chinese in-laws. Get prepared for that and remember that calm communication can always solve a problem.
probably it will cause many issues allnightlong Post time: 2018-9-29 17:33 static/image/common/back.gif
probably it will cause many issues
Certainly that would bring much benefit!:lol In laws are just harder to get along with, be they Chinese or not. Chengking Post time: 2018-9-30 04:27 static/image/common/back.gif
In laws are just harder to get along with, be they Chinese or not.
:handshake money solve all the problem
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