linda_sun Post time 2017-2-6 10:24:00

Should parents arrange dates for children?

A 21-year-old college junior was arranged 8 dates within 10 days by her parents when she returned to Wenzhou during the Spring Festival. Many parents in China try to help their children meet their soul mates by arranging dates for them. In some cases, the parents take the "lead roles" in the dates. Despite their good intentions, their children aren't grateful. Should parents arrange dates for children?

parcher Post time 2017-2-7 07:59:22

Why should they be grateful?
The kids will know their parents intentions may not always be in their interests

HailChina! Post time 2017-2-7 07:59:57

linda_sun Post time 2017-2-7 10:02:34

parcher Post time: 2017-2-7 07:59 static/image/common/back.gif
Why should they be grateful?
The kids will know their parents intentions may not always be in their ...

Nothing wrong with a parent trying to set their kid up, so long as the kid is receptive to it. And at times it works out and a happy ending follows.  Many young people cannot find a partner because of their narrow life circle. The face-paced life between home and workplace make them barely have a chance to meet the opposite sex.

linda_sun Post time 2017-2-7 10:03:53

HailChina! Post time: 2017-2-7 07:59 static/image/common/back.gif
My father asked a girl on a date for me once and I had no intention of asking her out. She said yes  ...

Seems it is not unique to Chinese culture.

markwu Post time 2017-2-7 11:07:48

It's a hope of all parents that their children will have good lifelong spouses, especially when most are also concerned that their children may not have the time or sufficient self-intuition to know what's good for themselves.  

See the arrangement as only parental love and concern to test fate one last time by applying what they think they know are best for their children to pull in the candidates whom they think make a match.

After all, the final decision will still reside with the children who should remain grateful for the nudging while being empathic with their parents' concern, parents being people from whom they came about to be born what more to develop characters over the formative years which may be quite different.

Don't let any dislike grow into tension and then conflict. Such is not harmonious.

And harmony is necessary to pierce the veil of ignorance, build goodwill and return all to a more progressive future.

The children should ask inwardly whether they themselves become parents, would they not also  hold the same concerns for their own children as their parents have held for them.

See life as a chain united by unspoken love and enduring devotion.

I am a good man with exceptional marketable qualities, no?  

(:$:lol)

parcher Post time 2017-2-7 14:36:42

linda_sun Post time: 2017-2-7 10:02 static/image/common/back.gif
Nothing wrong with a parent trying to set their kid up, so long as the kid is receptive to it. And ...

nothing wrong with suggestion a date with someone, but the decision should always rest with their son or daughter...
thats not always the case though
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