forget-me-not Post time 2014-7-8 11:45:51

Will you marry someone you don't love?

It's not me that has been married to someone I don't love.
It's one of my friends,from Henan province.
I heard they marry at early age in the north,earlier than us from the south.
She's same age with me,and got married last year,with a young man she knew just for three months.
She complained about how her parents and other relatives were giving her so much pressure to get married.
And I was there,explaining what could happen if you marry someone you don't have feelings for.

But still,the pressure got her,and she's married to the man.
Now,today,it's not even half a year since their marriage.
But she's already complaining to me three or four times about it.
Today again,telling me they already talked about divorce for 3 times,during the 6 months marriage.

And what can I say this time? Just tell her to stick to it,as this is the choice she made. If it's not that bad,should try to carry on.
After all,marriage is a big deal. And I never want to give advice about divorce to anybody,that will make me a bad person.

We are still young. Why do we have to marry,even if to someone we don't love?
Marriage here,in some people's eyes,are like a gurantee note,making sure someone's daughters or sons are taken care of,so that they can be relaxed. Marraige is like a plant,it has life,it can grow,bloom,and can die too. Or am I the only one thinking like this on this ancient land of China?

twinklestars Post time 2014-7-8 15:32:22

if i cant marry someone i love, i'd choose to marry someone who loves me..we dont know if we could meet the one we love at a proper time and place but the society has its definition of when to get married, so we have to try to complete the task before pressure from parents and society force u into a marriage...
but as to the one to marry, it is by no means someone u pick up at random...think about the years u will live with the one u marry, it's definitely a no to marry someone you dont love...

grb Post time 2014-7-8 15:34:53

Blame it on an archaic culture.

forget-me-not Post time 2014-7-8 21:08:01

twinklestars Post time: 2014-7-8 15:32 static/image/common/back.gif
if i cant marry someone i love, i'd choose to marry someone who loves me..we dont know if we could m ...

Dear,what's the logic between these two:
"if i cant marry someone i love, i'd choose to marry someone who loves me..

it's definitely a no to marry someone you dont love..."

Will you or will you not,then?

twinklestars Post time 2014-7-9 11:03:43

This post was edited by twinklestars at 2014-7-9 11:08

forget-me-not Post time: 2014-7-8 21:08 http://bbs.chinadaily.com.cn/static/image/common/back.gif
Dear,what's the logic between these two:
"if i cant marry someone i love, i'd choose to marry som ...

i mean i prefer to marry somesone i love and who also loves me but if this fails,  i would choose someone who loves me and also acceptable by me...if he really loves me, somehow i'd be moved by him...i dont dream of someone perfect..marriage is not love at first sight..those who are capable of running marriage can do well in the end..

益杰西 Post time 2014-7-9 15:11:12

The answer is absolutely no.

DMZappa Post time 2014-7-9 23:32:58

No. But…. "How many millions does she have?
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