My Secret Garden
Walking through the agonizing world with utmost uplifted attitudes

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A Vow to Myself

Viewed 419 times 2017-6-30 23:54 |System category:Life

In the last few days, I have been in a special mood for religions. I was being so frenzy at religions. The major reason for that may be how moody I am these days. I try to fling myself into the pit of religions to get rid of all my feelings for a short time. However, the result comes to no endings. For every second I am away from religional belief moods are around me as devils. Another way for me to release my negative power is to sing to every single pop songs for hours and hours. When I am singing, I can't help myself to pause for a stop. But I know that even in singing, I am in a mood, too. I've never flung off my feelings away. I just excite my brain till it exhausts its last energy, leaving me feeling only the tiredness around but not the feelings. But I can only cover my feelings for a short time by tiredness. That is always not the curing medicine for me.

I should be sober, back to myself again. No religions to count on. No songs to rely on. I should live on, move on without pretentious powers which seem to support me or  give me positive energy. Actually, they don't. They are just ways to cover the scars but ignore that the scars are opened to bleed.

Now, I am sober again. I stop to think it is time for me to embrace my life again. Here I give myself a vow: regard your every day precious, inject enthusiasm into you daily work, leave alone your feelings cuze of others, feel your heartbeats to live on, work so hard to make yourself extraordinary, live for your beautiful life given to you for so short a time, maybe 80 years, 70 years or even shorter, which I can't predit.

(Opinions of the writer in this blog don't represent those of China Daily.)




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